Some are so fond, so blinded in their Choice, That they are ravish'd with their beautious Prize; In such a case the young unthinking Sot, Boasts what a handsome Genteel Wife he'as got, Doates on her Face, commends her Shape and Air, And thinks her Virtuous beyond compare: When all the time she plays her Pranks unknown, And with her Gallant rambles up and down; [*?]y, brings him home, while the poor Husband's sent On some Fools Errand, she has her content: At length he finds her out, but dare not speak, But bears all calmly for his Honour's sake. _The Thirteenth Comfort of Matrimony._ This Married to some Beauty of Renown, } Whose Business often keeps him out of Town; } But the good Woman cannot lie alone: } While the poor _Lawyer's_ stating o'er the Case, She finds another to supply his Place; And proving pregnant, reckons up the Time, Lest the Sot Husband shou'd suspect her Crime. She swallows Drugs and Poysons ev'ry day, To bring the Child before its time away; This she performs so often, and is Sick, That he at length begins to smoak the Trick; Next time he keeps account, and plains it is, He swears point-blank the Child is none of his. _The Fourteenth Comfort of Matrimony._ The next a Widow thinks it best to Wed, And takes the knowing Matron to his Bed, A while he quenches her insatiate Fire, But in a little times begins to tire, The _Lady_ soon the difference can find, And truly very plainly speaks her Mind, She twits him of the good departed Man, Whose like, she says, _She ne'er shall see again, He never left me in a Morning so, But took a parting Kiss before he'd go; And get me some Good Thing for Breakfast too: Well, he a dear kind Husband was to me, But now my Days are spent in Misery._ _The Fifteenth Comfort of Matrimony._ Last, and not least of all these Comforts is, The Man that's Wedded unto some Disease, A peevish, crazy, and a sickly Wife, The Burthen and the Nusance of his Life; Her Bed, the meer resemblance of a Tomb, And an _Apothecarys_ Shop her Room; Coughing and Spitting all the Night she lies, A very Antidote to Marriage Joys: Yet the poor Man must bear with all these Ills, Besides the Excessive Charge of Physick Bills, A Nurse, fine Cordials, and a hundred things, Until his Substance she to little brings, Till may be she at length resigns to Death, The only Comfort he cou'd hope on Earth. FINIS.