_Shr. London_, Master, is the Seat of Business, People do ev'ry thing in a
hurry here, except paying their Debts, and lying with their Wives; but
what Notion had you of the Town before you saw it?
_Tot_. Why, my Grand-mother says, Tis the wicked'st Place under the Copes
of Heav'n, and the Filthinesses she has seen there, have made her frigid
to Mankind; she says, young Fellows are greedy after young Wenches, and
make a scoff at old Folks; Men of Quality have no sense of well-doing, and
Women o'Quality no sense of Self-denial; your highflown Gentry, no sense
of Humility, and the Common People no sense of good Manners; mid-night
Collonels, no sense of Sobriety; Vintners no sense of Honesty; City Wives,
no sense of Chastity, and their Husbands, no sense at all.
_Shr_. You are deceiv'd, Master, People come hither for Education and
Improvement: Ev'ry Merchant's Prentice now assumes an air of Wisdom, talks
of Gaming, Dress, and Poetry; frequents the Hazard-Table at _Lambeth_, the
Bowling-Green at _Islington_, and keeps a Race-Horse for _Hackney-Marsh_;
has a Silver Watch double gilt, Pearl colour Silk Stockings, and a
black Suit for _Lent_, with a couple of Drop-Locks hanging up in the
Counting-house, which are occasionally hook'd on to a Spruce-Bob to Squire
two Chamber-Maids to the _Rival Queens_.
_Tot_. But do People obey their Parents in _London_?
_Shr_. Never, never, Master, this is an Age of Freedom and good Humour;
Fathers tope Claret with their Sons, and Mothers _Rosa Solis_ with their
Daughters; they Rake together, Intreague together, divide Estates, and
persue their Inclinations; Familiarity makes young Fellows easie, and old
Fellows have the happiness to live out all their Days.
_Tot_. O Gemini that's pure! well I always had a mighty mind to see
_London_, because my Grand-mother would never let me; and d'you belong to
Sir _Harry Sprightly_, say you, Sir?
_Shr_. I do my self the Honour to sojourn with him; Sir _Harry_
Compliments me with adjusting some Solecisms in his Dress; we were
Neighbour's Children in the Country, and always very fond of one another,
he begg'd the Favour of me to meet you at the Inn, give you some
refreshment, and conduct you to his Lodgings;--Oh! Here comes a Friend
o'mine lately return'd from _Flanders_, that will be glad to associate
with us; he's a Person of great Worth, I assure you, and might have had
great Preferments in the Army; but his good Manners, like some other
well-bred military Sparks, made him rather retreat than put himself
forward.
_Enter_ Knapsack.
Mr. _Knapsack_, your most humble Servant, an ingenious young Gentleman
here, just arriv'd from the Fenns in _Lincolnshire,_ desires to be known
to you; he's at present but a rough Diamond wholly ignorant of the Town,
but your Conversation will make him Brillant.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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