Through all the changing pomp of seasons, while the sun showered down
its yellow rays, while the rain striped it with grey markings, and
the snow lay heavy and white upon it, the vision of the tree was
present to me, first as a colossal column, standing up in heaven,
then as a broken ruin, prostrate on the ground. As through a light
haze I have tried to distinguish the splendour of its life, and the
tragedy of its death: and all this while the blue and green and grey
country in which the sequoia lived and died has become in some degree
my own country, a part of me. I grew to love those distant hills,
modulating away to invisibility on some shining day of spring; I
learned to feel the sadness of the autumn twilights which made the
background of the pine-tree go so pale and lifeless and desolate. I
traced at length the slow circulation of the giant's sap, and became
sensitive like the tree to light and shadow, to all the influences,
exciting or soporific, of the type of country in which I had placed
it. Nevertheless, all this creation of a vast landscape, and the
huge form of the tree, took shape, endured, and ended in a tiny
space, one of those imperceptible and secret compartments called
cells, parts of our bodies immeasurable by human wit.
Outside my window the world was growing feeble in the failing autumn,
but from the white page which I slowly darkened with my writing
bloomed for my sight a summer scene of green and gold, where once the
giant tree had stood, but which now was again become clear ground and
azure sky: and I told myself how shortly my memory-cell would produce
for me a new mind-landscape, new images, new sentiments. Such
dreams, born within ourselves, have the vividness of real incidents,
while they last: to such a degree that it seems questionable whether
the physical shocks we undergo and the palpable matter we encounter
are really the intensest experiences of our lives. May it not be
rather that our sharpest colouring comes from the volatile and
obscure matter of our ideas and dreams, with its rich palette of
innumerable shades? Only by means of the abstract part of our nature
do we commune with the universe. Our likes and dislikes, our
delights and despairs are not the issue of our carnal parts,
offspring of our blood and nerves, except in so far as these are
submissive conductors of the hidden reactions of our imagination. A
single dream will change the current of our life, and our actions are
the product of the powerful but hidden inner world of our minds.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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