"Be that as it may; I know that he created much annoyance among the neighbors; for he commenced braying in a most extraordinary manner. His friends gathered around him and endeavored to reason him out of his unhappy delusion, but all to no purpose, for he had got the idea in his head that he was a prodigious jackass, and the more they talked to him the more loudly he would bray. He refused his natural food, and demanded to be led to the stable, that he might have a manger, and be fed on provender suitable for animals of the asinine species. The doctors had much trouble with him, and tried various remedies without any apparent good result. They finally determined to drench him with strong brandy, and the potency of this fluid soon restored him to a more happy condition of body and mind. He recovered, and sent for the distinguished lawyer, M. T. Pate, and by his advice brought suit against the barber, laying the damages at one thousand dollars." "For what?" "For injury done to the young man's head. The barber was dreadfully frightened at the prospect of a ruinous litigation, and solicited my professional services. M. T. Pate exerted himself to the utmost, and, in a carefully prepared and eloquent speech, endeavored to demonstrate to the jury how great an injury had been done to his client's head; at the same time denouncing the author of the outrage in terms of unmeasured vituperation. But his efforts were of no avail, for I was prepared with the proof, and had put more than a dozen witnesses on the stand, all of whom swore that the young man looked much better with his head of a pea-green color than he did when it was of a fiery red. In consequence of this testimony the jury came to the conclusion that the plaintiff had sustained no injury and was entitled to no damages. They rendered a verdict in favor of the defendant, and M. T. Pate's client not only had to pay the costs of the suit, but went by the name of the 'LONG GREEN BOY' ever afterwards." "Mr. Belton, I am exceedingly glad to see you," said a tall, raw-boned man, with a keen, dark eye, a Roman nose, and a swarthy visage. "Mr. Seddon," said Toney, "let me introduce you to Captain Bragg, a famous traveler, who has seen more of this terrestrial globe than we have ever read of." Seddon shook hands with the distinguished cosmopolite, and remarked that the weather was extremely hot. "Hot!" said Bragg. "My dear sir, do you call it hot? You should have been with me when I was once invited by her Majesty the Queen of Madagascar to a royal feast. As we sat at table under an awning, huge pieces of the most delicious beef were served up, which had been roasted by being exposed to the vertical rays of a tropical sun. That was what I would call hot weather, Mr. Seddon. But, by the powers of mud! what is that?"