The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A NovelYellott, George
General
The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A Novel
Yellott, George
Fiction
A loud noise and trampling of feet were heard in the hall. The door flew
open, and women shrieked and men stood aghast, as a horrible apparition
entered the ball-room. It seemed like an ugly demon with two heads. The
monster rushed among the dancers, howling and screeching, and creating
the most extraordinary confusion. Ladies, with loud cries, clung to
their partners for protection, as with unearthly yells the two-headed
monster rushed around. All seemed to lose presence of mind except Toney
Belton, who tripped up the heels of the hideous intruder, and it fell on
the floor. Then was witnessed a fearful conflict. While the women
scampered away, and ran screaming through the hall, the men gathered
around, and soon recognized the belligerents. It was Ned Botts, engaged
in a hand-to-hand encounter with a gigantic and ferocious monkey
belonging to Captain Bragg. The creature had escaped from confinement
and had perched itself on the stairway in the hall. As Botts, after
having enjoyed a mint-julep, was returning from the refreshment-room, it
sprang upon his shoulders and seized him by the hair. Terrible was the
combat between Botts and the monkey. Each made the most ugly grimaces
and exhibited the most deadly ferocity. Botts grappled his antagonist by
the throat, and the fight would have ended in a tragedy had not Bragg
interfered.
Maddened with passion, Botts sprang to his feet and put himself in a
boxing attitude, whereupon Bragg knocked him down. The gentlemen present
now interposed, and Botts was carried off, loudly vociferating, and
swearing vengeance against Bragg and his monkey.
CHAPTER III.
The excitement occasioned by the terrific combat in the ball-room was
intense. On the following morning groups of anxious persons were
discussing the probability of a duel between Bragg and Botts. There had
been an interchange not only of harsh language but of blows between
these gentlemen, and it was the general opinion that a hostile meeting
was inevitable. Toney and Tom were sitting in the room of the former,
puffing their cigars, and conversing about the events of the preceding
evening, when there was a knock at the door, followed by the entry of a
gentleman whose countenance indicated that he was troubled by very great
mental anxiety.
"Good-morning, Mr. Pate. Let me introduce you to my friend Mr. Seddon."
The two gentlemen shook hands, and Seddon made some meteorological
observation, which was unheeded by Pate, who nervously turned to Toney,
and said,--
"Mr. Belton, I have called to see you about a matter of great
importance,--I might say an affair of life or death."
"Indeed, Mr. Pate! To what have you reference?"
"I refer, sir, to the unfortunate affair between our friend Mr. Botts
and--and----"
"The monkey?"
"Just so, sir. I am afraid that the--the--the difficulty will end in--in
bloodshed, sir. I apprehend that Mr. Botts is about to send a challenge
to--to--to----"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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