The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A NovelYellott, George
General
The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A Novel
Yellott, George
Fiction
"Sam was taken to the place of execution, and having undergone his
punishment with heroic fortitude, was about to be released by the
constable, when his counsel appeared in court and moved for a new trial.
The court ordered the officer to keep a sharp lookout on Sam, and sent
for Piddler, who was celebrating his victory in a neighboring bar-room.
Pate argued his motion with much ability, and demonstrated that the hen
was worth so much, and that when the twenty eggs were hatched each
chicken would be worth so much, and that the aggregate would amount to a
sum sufficient to constitute the offense of grand larceny, over which
the court had no jurisdiction. Piddler was fuddled, and failing to
perceive any other weak point in his adversary's argument, contented
himself with saying that he did not think that his learned brother had
any right to count his chickens before they were hatched. Justice
Johnson very properly rebuked him for his levity; and firmly expressing
his determination to maintain the dignity of the court, finally granted
a new trial. So the case was again tried and with the same result. Sam
was convicted and sentenced to receive another installment of twelve
lashes on his bare back. Piddler always boasted of his success in this
prosecution, and said that if he was defeated on the motion for a new
trial, nevertheless he had got the curly-headed rascal twenty-four
lashes on his bare back instead of twelve. On the other hand, Mr. Pate,
after he had acquired more experience in his profession, candidly
acknowledged that the motion for a new trial was an error on his part,
as it could do his client no good under the circumstances, and actually
did him a deal of harm. But he said he was then young, and allowed
himself to be carried away by too eager a desire for the glory of a
victory over his vaunting antagonist.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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