The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.Crabtre, Addison Darre
History
The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.
Crabtre, Addison Darre
Medicine -- Anecdotes; Quacks and quackery
He had made a mistake! that's all. He had compounded an ounce of tincture
of nux instead of a drachm! Not that a drachm could be taken at a dose
with impunity; but whatever the dose was, the patient was continually
taking eight times as much as the physician intended to prescribe.
Another reason of the failure of the prescribing physician meeting the
expectation anticipated, is the use of old and inert medicines.
Where a man's treasure is, his heart is also. An apothecary's interest is
more in nostrums, tobacco, _soda_, etc., than in medicines; how, then, can
he follow the excellent advice of Dr. Bullyn, in article "14, that he
peruse often his wares, that they corrupt not."
But the greatest cheat is in the "substituting" business; the "_quid pro
quo_." Horse aloes may be bought for ten cents a pound. Podophyllin costs
seventy-five cents an ounce. They each act as cathartic, and I have
detected the former put in place of the latter. How is the physician to
know the cheat? How is the patient to detect it? Perhaps the former
_stuff_--aloes--may have given the victim the hemorrhoids. One dose may be
quite sufficient to produce that distressing disease. This only calls for
another prescription! So it looks a deal like a "you tickle me, and I'll
tickle you" profession, at best. Thus the patient becomes disgusted, and
resorts to our next--"Patent Medicines."
In closing this chapter on Apothecaries, I must relate a little scene to
which I was an eye-witness. Meantime, let me say to the "respectable
druggist," Don't be offended if I have slighted you by leaving you out, in
my description of the various kinds of apothecaries enumerated above.
There is a respectable class of druggists whom I have not mentioned, and
doubtless you belong to that order.
On going home one evening, not long since, I observed several boys, loud
and boisterous, surrounding a lamp post. As I approached, I heard, among
the cries and vociferations,--
"Howld to it, Jimmy; it'll be the makin' of ye."
I drew nearer, and discovered a sickly-looking lad leaning up against the
lamp post, with the stump of a cigar in his mouth, and a taller boy
endeavoring to hold him up by his jacket collar, while a short-set urchin
was stooping behind to assist in the task. They were evidently endeavoring
to teach "Jimmy" to smoke. The poor fellow was deathly sick, and faintly
begged to be let off.
"O, no, no. Stick to it, Jimmy; it'll be the makin' of yese," was
repeated.
"Sure, ye'll niver do for a _sample clark in a potecary shop_," said
another, as he blew a cloud of smoke from his own cigar stump into the
pale face of the victim to modern accomplishments.
[Illustration: A CANDIDATE FOR THE PRESIDENCY.]
"General Grant smokes, Jimmy, and you'll never be a man if you don't
learn," added a voice minus the brogue.
A policeman here interfered, and rescued the wretched "Jimmy."
"What is a sample clerk, my lad?" I asked of the boy who had used the
above expression.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account