Autobiographical fiction; France -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Since actors had ceased to be for me exclusively the depositaries, in
their diction and playing, of an artistic truth, they had begun to
interest me in themselves; I amused myself, pretending that what I saw
before me were the characters in some old humorous novel, by watching,
struck by the fresh face of the young man who had just come into the
stalls, the heroine listen distractedly to the declaration of love which
the juvenile lead in the piece was addressing to her, while he, through
the fiery torrent of his impassioned speech, still kept a burning gaze
fixed on an old lady seated in a stage box, whose magnificent pearls had
caught his eye; and thus, thanks especially to the information that
Saint-Loup gave me as to the private lives of the players, I saw another
drama, mute but expressive, enacted beneath the words of the spoken
drama which in itself, although of no merit, interested me also; for I
could feel in it that there were budding and opening for an hour in the
glare of the footlights, created out of the agglutination on the face of
an actor of another face of grease paint and pasteboard, on his own
human soul the words of a part.
These ephemeral vivid personalities which the characters are in a play
that is entertaining also, whom one loves, admires, pities, whom one
would like to see again after one has left the theatre, but who by that
time are already disintegrated into a comedian who is no longer in the
position which he occupied in the play, a text which no longer shews one
the comedian’s face, a coloured powder which a handkerchief wipes off,
who have returned in short to elements that contain nothing of them,
since their dissolution, effected so soon after the end of the show,
make us—like the dissolution of a dear friend—begin to doubt the reality
of our ego and meditate on the mystery of death.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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