French essays -- Translations into English; World War, 1914-1918 -- Influence
Through the depths of this reverie I became aware of a slight,
muffled blow against my right shoulder. This did not rouse me from
my own absorption. A second time the blow came, followed by a soft,
continuous contact. It gave me a disagreeable sensation.
By my side there was a young boy of sixteen or seventeen, dressed like
an apprentice. The uncertain glimmer of the street-lamps lighted up
his pale, weary face. His eyes were closed and he seemed overwhelmed
with sleep. I noticed that every few moments his head, swaying with the
jolts of the vehicle, would strike against my shoulder. He would raise
it up with an instinctive movement, only to let it fall back the more
heavily the next moment. Once he let it lie there. At the time I was
so lost in my dreams that the animal in me alone rose to its defense:
I pushed the young lad gently back into his place. It was trouble
lost; the next second he abandoned himself anew against my shoulder
with a sort of desperate ingenuousness. I pushed him back two or three
times, then I gave it up and tried, in spite of this slight burden, to
continue my glorious excursion in the interior of my own self.
But I did not succeed. An extraordinary, unforeseen, unknown sensation
was sweeping over me. It was a penetrating animal warmth. It came
from that head propped against my shoulder, and also from a certain
frail, bent arm which I felt slowly digging into my side. The little
apprentice was sound asleep.
I bent down my face and felt his breath like that of a child passing
in little puffs over my cheek and my chin. From that moment on, I
ceased completely to think of my important personal affairs and I had
only one anxiety: to see to it that the boy did not awaken.
I do not know how long this sleep lasted: I was warm with a strange,
delicate warmth; I had a sense of well-being, I was absorbed, I was
penetrating into an unknown universe, as vast, as starry as my own. I
could not understand how this contact could have offended me at first,
even disgusted me. I had torn off the prickly shell and was tasting,
like a nourishing kernel, that human presence and companionship. I was
happy and interested.
We reached a place where there were shouts and lights. The little
fellow sat up with a start, rubbed his eyes and ran stumbling towards
the stairway and disappeared; he had not even seen me.
He did not know what I owed him and that he would never be forgotten.
IX
One must not, at first sight, say that a man is uninteresting and that
his face is expressionless. One might as well say that the water of a
river is empty when it swarms with vegetable and animal life.
In one’s manner of listening to a man there may be prejudice and
suspicion, there must not be indifference or indolence. The soul has,
in its arsenal, lenses, microscopes, and powerful sources of light for
exploring objects to their depths, through their transparencies, into
the innermost recesses of their organs.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account