Again, he thought, the same mystery would be represented before him;
suddenly on some dark and gloomy night, as he wandered lonely on a
deserted road, the wind hurrying before him, suddenly a turn would
bring him again upon the fiery stage, and the antique drama would be
re-enacted. He would be drawn to the same place, to find that woman
still standing there; again he would watch the rose radiant and
palpitating upon her cheek, the argent gleam in her brown eyes, the
bronze curls gilding the white splendor of her neck. And for the second
time she would freely offer herself. He could hear the wail of the
singers swelling to a shriek, and see the dusky dancers whirling round
in a faster frenzy, and the naphtha flares tinged with red, as the
woman and he went away into the dark, into the cloistered court where
every flower was a flame, whence he would never come out.
His only escape was in the desk; he might find salvation if he could
again hide his heart in the heap and litter of papers, and again be
rapt by the cadence of a phrase. He threw open his window and looked
out on the dim world and the glimmering amber lights. He resolved that
he would rise early in the morning, and seek once more for his true
life in the work.
But there was a strange thing. There was a little bottle on the
mantelpiece, a bottle of dark blue glass, and he trembled and shuddered
before it, as if it were a fetish.
VII.
It was very dark in the room. He seemed by slow degrees to awake from a
long and heavy torpor, from an utter forgetfulness, and as he raised
his eyes he could scarcely discern the pale whiteness of the paper on
the desk before him. He remembered something of a gloomy winter
afternoon, of driving rain, of gusty wind: he had fallen asleep over
his work, no doubt, and the night had come down.
He lay back in his chair, wondering whether it were late; his eyes were
half closed, and he did not make the effort and rouse himself. He could
hear the stormy noise of the wind, and the sound reminded him of the
half-forgotten days. He thought of his boyhood, and the old rectory,
and the great elms that surrounded it. There was something pleasant in
the consciousness that he was still half dreaming; he knew he could
wake up whenever he pleased, but for the moment he amused himself by
the pretence that he was a little boy again, tired with his rambles and
the keen air of the hills. He remembered how he would sometimes wake up
in the dark at midnight, and listen sleepily for a moment to the rush
of the wind straining and crying amongst the trees, and hear it beat
upon the walls, and then he would fall to dreams again, happy in his
warm, snug bed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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