the violent height with faerie bulwarks, from the gate in the lane, and
to leave all within the ring of oaks in the mystery of his boyhood’s
vision. He professed to laugh at himself and at his fancies of that hot
August afternoon, when sleep came to him within the thicket, but in his
heart of hearts there was something that never faded—something that
glowed like the red glint of a gypsy’s fire seen from afar across the
hills and mists of the night, and known to be burning in a wild land.
Sometimes, when he was sunken in his books, the flame of delight shot
up, and showed him a whole province and continent of his nature, all
shining and aglow; and in the midst of the exultation and triumph he
would draw back, a little afraid. He had become ascetic in his studious
and melancholy isolation, and the vision of such ecstasies frightened
him. He began to write a little; at first very tentatively and feebly,
and then with more confidence. He showed some of his verses to his
father, who told him with a sigh that he had once hoped to write—in the
old days at Oxford, he added.
“They are very nicely done,” said the parson; “but I’m afraid you won’t
find anybody to print them, my boy.”
So he pottered on; reading everything, imitating what struck his fancy,
attempting the effect of the classic meters in English verse, trying
his hand at a masque, a Restoration comedy, forming impossible plans
for books which rarely got beyond half a dozen lines on a sheet of
paper; beset with splendid fancies which refused to abide before the
pen. But the vain joy of conception was not altogether vain, for it
gave him some armor about his heart.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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