English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
"Meaning me?" I asked in surprise. Myra looked beseechingly at me as
she arranged the children all round her. I sat down near them and
tried to think.
"Once upon a time," I said, "there was a--a--there was a--was a--a
bee."
Myra nodded approvingly. She seemed to like the story so far. I
didn't. The great dearth of adventures that could happen to a bee
was revealed to me in a flash. I saw that I had been hasty.
"At least," I went on, "he thought he was a bee, but as he grew up
his friends felt that he was not really a bee at all, but a dear
little rabbit. His fur was too long for a bee."
Myra shook her head at me and frowned. My story was getting
over-subtle for the infant mind. I determined to straighten it out
finally.
"However," I added, "the old name stuck to him, and they all called
him a bee. Now then I can get on. Where was I?"
But at this moment my story was interrupted.
"Come here," shouted Archie from the distance. "You're wanted."
"I'm sorry," I said, getting up quickly. "Will you finish the story
for me? You'd better leave out the part where he stings the Shah of
Persia. That's too exciting. Good-bye." And I hurried after Archie.
"Help Simpson with some of these races," said Archie. "He's getting
himself into the dickens of a mess."
Simpson had started two races simultaneously; hence the trouble. In
one of them the bigger boys had to race to a sack containing their
boots, rescue their own pair, put them on, and race back to the
starting-point. Good! In the other the smaller boys, each armed with
a paper containing a problem in arithmetic, had to run to their
sisters, wait for the problem to be solved, and then run back with
the answer. Excellent! Simpson at his most inventive. Unfortunately,
when the bootless boys arrived at the turning post, they found
nothing but a small problem in arithmetic awaiting them, while on
the adjoining stretch of grass young mathematicians were trying,
with the help of their sisters, to get into two pairs of boots at
once.
"Hallo, there you are," said Simpson. "Do help me; I shall be mobbed
in a moment. It's the mothers. They think the whole thing is a
scheme for stealing their children's boots. Can't you start a race
for them?"
"You never ought to go about without somebody. Where's Thomas?"
"He's playing rounders. He scored a rounder by himself just now from
an overthrow, but we shall hear about it at dinner. Look here,
there's a game called 'Twos and Threes.' Couldn't you start the
mothers at that? You stand in twos, and whenever anyone stands in
front of the two then the person behind the two runs away."
"Are you sure?"
"What do you mean?" said Simpson.
"It sounds too exciting to be true. I can't believe it."
"Go on, there's a good chap. They'll know how to play all right."
"Oh, very well. Do they take their boots off first or not?"
Twos and Threes was a great success.
I found that I had quite a FLAIR for the game. I seemed to take to
it naturally.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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