London (England) -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
"You can’t believe there’s anything like that," she cried piteously.
"Why, he wouldn’t look at me—not in that way. He knows I belong to you.
If he thinks of me at all it’s as he would of the little East-end
children that people take down into the country for a day. He’s a lord
and I’m just common Maggy, and he condescended to be kind to me.
Believe me, Fred, believe me, or I—I shall die. I can’t live without
you. You know I can’t!"
Woolf did believe her. Although he hated Chalfont and his
exclusiveness, which had once been the means of humbling him, he knew
well enough that because of that very exclusiveness he would be
punctilious in his attitude toward Maggy. He did not make the mistake
of comparing Maggy’s position with that of Mrs. Lambert. The latter was
a woman of some social standing, separated from her husband. What did
genuinely enrage Woolf was that Chalfont should be so contemptuous of
his, Woolf’s, relations with Maggy that he could be friendly with her in
spite of them. It meant that he was ignored. It was inconceivable to
him that Chalfont’s attitude toward her was largely dictated by a
touching respect for her personality, and pity that she should be
associated with such a man as himself.
"Don’t make a scene," was his unmoved rejoinder. "We can settle things
quite quietly if you’ll be sensible."
Maggy felt a fierce desire to scream and laugh and cry and so break her
nightmare by noise. The cataclysm had come upon her so suddenly; the
break seemed so imminent; her hold over Woolf so frail. She seemed to
have held him by a thread and that thread had now snapped. Her
sensation was one of absolute shipwreck. She experienced the very
paralysis of actual drowning, the throbbing of pulses in her head, the
suffocation in her throat, the sense of being entirely submerged. And
just as the drowning person is said to survey the past with startling
clearness so she now had a rapid mental vista of her brief season of
love and the desolation that would follow it if Woolf meant what he
said.
"I’m _not_ sensible," she pleaded. "You can’t give me up for such a
little thing as that. Oh, you’re cruel, cruel!"
"If you’re going to be hysterical I shan’t stop."
His unrelenting manner had a steadying effect on her. Tortured, but
silent, she stared at him. Could this be the man whom she had been able
to soften and cajole with a mere pose of her body; the man who had taken
possession of her with such controlling ardor that she was oblivious of
the very details of her capitulation; the man whom she had loved with
such devastating vehemence? She could see by the utterly unmoved
expression of his face that it was impossible to stir his pity. There
might be a bare chance of exciting his passion, but a new-born delicacy
of feeling in her prevented an appeal to that side of his nature. She
made a strong effort to keep a hold on herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account