The Humour of America: Selected, with an Introduction and Index of American Humorists — John Shaqi
The Humour of America: Selected, with an Introduction and Index of American Humorists
General
The Humour of America: Selected, with an Introduction and Index of American Humorists
American wit and humor
Jes’ a sorto’ lazein’ there—
S’ lazy, ’at you peek and peer
Through the wavin’ leaves above,
Like a feller ’ats in love
And don’t know it, ner don’t keer.
Ever’thing you hear and see
Got some sort o’ interest—
Maybe find a bluebird’s nest
Tucked up there conveenently
Fer the boys ’ats apt to be
Up some other apple tree!
Watch the swallers skootin’ past
’bout as peert as you could ast;
Er the Bobwhite raise and whiz
Where some other’s whistle is.
IV.
Ketch a shadder down below,
And look up to find the crow;
Er a hawk away up there,
’Pearantly froze in the air!—
Hear the old hen squawk, and squat
Over every chick she’s got,
Suddent-like!—And she knows where
That air hawk is, well as you!—
You jes’ bet yer life she do!—
Eyes a-glittering like glass
Waitin’ till he makes a pass!
V.
Pee-wees’ singin’, to express
My opinion, ’s second class,
Yit you’ll hear ’em more er less;
Sapsucks gettin’ down to biz,
Weedin’ out the lonesomeness;
Mr. Bluejay, full o’ sass,
In those base-ball clothes o’ his,
Sportin’ ’round the orchard jes’
Like he owned the premises!
Sun out in the field kin sizz,
But flat on yer back, I guess,
In the shade’s where glory is!
That’s jes’ what I’d like to do
Stiddy fer a year er two!
VI.
Plague! ef they aint sompin’ in
Work ’at kindo’ goes agin
My convictions!—’long about
Here in June especially!—
Under some old apple tree
Jes’ a-restin’ through and through,
I could git along without
Nothin’ else at all to do
Only jes’ a-wishin’ you
Was a-gettin’ there like me,
And June was eternity!
VII.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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