"Oh no," said the Idiot, "I knocked off a little quatrain on that. I called it 'The Speedy Egg-Beater,' and it goes like this: "Great Maude S. can beat all steeds, However speedy be their legs; But I distance her with ease When it comes to beating eggs." "I really think that you would have done better to give up the egg-beater," said the Poet, grown critical. "I've no patience with one-rhymed quatrains. Now if you had written: "Great Maude S. can beat all steeds, However speedy be their legs; But despite her doughty deeds; I can beat her beating eggs, "I should not have objected." "I accept the amendment," replied the Idiot, meekly. "I realized the weakness of the thing myself, and thought of changing it into a couplet, where you only need one rhyme. How's this on a 'Carpet-Tack'?" [Illustration: "'FOR THOUGH I'M BUT A CARPET-TACK AFAR FROM MOIL AND STRIFE, NO ONE CAN EVER TRULY SAY THAT MINE'S A POINTLESS LIFE'"] "However dull the day, However dull the skies, However dark the night may be, My spirits ever rise. "For though I'm but a carpet-tack, Afar from moil and strife, No one can ever truly say That mine's a pointless life." "That is very good," said the Poet. "I think almost any editor of any comic paper would be willing to pay you three dollars for that. It is as good as your poem on a ton of coal--simple in its expression and sweet in sentiment." "I thought you'd think so," said the Idiot. "It struck me so. I've got one on a screw-driver, too, that is very much of the same order, and conveys a moral lesson to the reader who is always reaching out after the unattainable. It reads as follows: "I cannot tool a tally-ho, I cannot drive a nag; I dare not hold the ribbons On a hack or rumbling drag. "I could not guide the reins upon A simple billy-goat, And I should hesitate to try To drive a can-al boat. "But I don't mind these things at all, For I can drive a screw, And I am happy, for that's just What I was meant to do." [Illustration: "'I SHOULD HESITATE TO TRY TO WRITE A CAN-AL BOAT'"] "The fourth line of the second verse is weak, but otherwise it's good," commented the Poet. "It's not a _can_-al boat; it's a can-_al_ boat, and all the poetic license in the world wouldn't excuse your taking such a liberty with language." "I appreciate that," said the Idiot. "But I don't see how I could get around it." "There's only one way," said the Poet. "I think if you omitted that verse altogether you'd improve the poem." "Then I should have to eliminate the billy-goat," said the Idiot. "That takes a great deal of humor out of it. I always laugh when I encounter a beast like that in poetry; he seems so helpless when incarcerated in a poem."