I dominated, I possessed that room. My eyes entered it. I was in it.
All who would be there would be there with me without knowing it. I
should see them, I should hear them, I should be as much in their
company as though the door were open.
. . . . .
A moment later I raised my face to the hole and looked again.
The candle was out, but some one was there. It was the maid. No doubt
she had come in to put the room in order. Then she paused.
She was alone. She was quite near me. But I did not very well see the
living being who was moving about, perhaps because I was dazzled by
seeing it so truly--a dark blue apron, falling down from her waist like
rays of evening, white wrists, hands darker than her wrists from toil,
a face undecided yet striking, eyes hidden yet shining, cheeks
prominent and clear, a knot on top of her head gleaming like a crown.
A short time before I had seen the girl on the staircase bending over
cleaning the banisters, her reddened face close to her large hands. I
had found her repulsive because of those blackened hands of hers and
the dusty chores that she stooped over. I had also seen her in a
hallway walking ahead of me heavily, her hair hanging loose and her
body giving out an unpleasant odour, so that you felt it was obnoxious
and wrapped in dirty underwear.
. . . . .
And now I looked at her again. The evening gently dispelled the
ugliness, wiped out the misery and the horror, changed the dust into
shadow, like a curse turned into a blessing. All that remained of her
was colour, a mist, an outline; not even that; a thrill and the beating
of her heart. Every trace of her had disappeared save her true self.
That was because she was alone. An extraordinary thing, a dash of the
divine in it, to be actually alone. She was in that perfect innocence,
that purity which is solitude.
I desecrated her solitude with my eyes, but she did not know it, and so
/she/ was not desecrated.
She went over to the window with brightening eyes and swinging hands in
her apron of the colour of the nocturnal sky. Her face and the upper
part of her body were illuminated. She seemed to be in heaven.
She sat down on the sofa, a great low red shadow in the depths of the
room near the window. She leaned her broom beside her. Her dust cloth
fell to the floor and was lost from sight.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account