A PRISONER being called on to plead to an indictment for larceny, was told by the clerk to hold up his right hand. The man immediately held up his left hand. "Hold up your _right_ hand," said the clerk. "Please your honor," said the culprit, still keeping up his left hand, "I am _left-handed_." XCII.--LIGHT-HEADED. DR. BURNEY, who wrote the celebrated anagram on Lord Nelson, after his victory of the Nile, "Honor est a Nilo" (Horatio Nelson), was shortly after on a visit to his lordship, at his beautiful villa at Merton. From his usual absence of mind, he neglected to put a nightcap into his portmanteau, and consequently borrowed one from his lordship. Before retiring to rest, he sat down to study, as was his common practice, having first put on the cap, and was shortly after alarmed by finding it in flames; he immediately collected the burnt remains, and returned them with the following lines:-- "Take your nightcap again, my good lord, I desire, I would not retain it a minute; What belongs to a Nelson, wherever there's _fire_, Is sure to be instantly _in it_." XCIII.--"HE LIES LIKE TRUTH." A PERSON who had resided for some time on the coast of Africa was asked if he thought it possible to civilize the natives. "As a proof of the possibility of it," said he, "I have known some negroes that thought as little of a _lie_ or an _oath_ as any European." XCIV.--HAND AND GLOVE. A DYER, in a court of justice, being ordered to hold up his hand, that was all black; "Take off your _glove_, friend," said the judge to him. "Put on your _spectacles_, my lord," answered the dyer. XCV.--VAST DOMAIN. A GENTLEMAN having a servant with a very thick skull, used often to call him the king of fools. "I wish," said the fellow one day, "you could make your words good, I should then be the _greatest_ monarch in the world." XCVI.--MONEY RETURNED. A LAWYER being sick, made his last will, and gave all his estate to fools and madmen: being asked the reason for so doing; "From such," said he, "I _had_ it, and to such I _give_ it again." XCVII.--CHEESE AND DESSERT. TWO city ladies meeting at a visit, one a grocer's wife, and the other a cheesemonger's, when they had risen up and took their departure, the cheesemonger's wife was going out of the room first, upon which the grocer's lady, pulling her back by the tail of her gown, and stepping before her, said, "No, madam, nothing comes after _cheese_." XCVIII.--VERY POINTED. SIR JOHN HAMILTON, who had severely suffered from the persecutions of the law, used to say, that an attorney was like a hedgehog, it was impossible to touch him anywhere without _pricking_ one's fingers. XCIX.--"THE MIXTURE AS BEFORE."