The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
Even as the _Schnorrer_ spake it flashed upon Grobstock that Manasseh
was more presentable with the salmon than without it--in fact, that
the salmon was the salvation of the situation. When Grobstock bought
fish he often hired a man to carry home the spoil. Manasseh would have
all the air of such a loafer. Who would suspect that the fish and even
the bag belonged to the porter, though purchased with the gentleman's
money? Grobstock silently thanked Providence for the ingenious way in
which it had contrived to save his self-respect. As a mere
fish-carrier Manasseh would attract no second glance from the
household; once safely in, it would be comparatively easy to smuggle
him out, and when he did come on Friday night it would be in the
metamorphosing glories of a body-coat, with his unspeakable
undergarment turned into a shirt and his turban knocked into a cocked
hat.
They emerged into Aldgate, and then turned down Leman Street, a
fashionable quarter, and so into Great Prescott Street. At the
critical street corner Grobstock's composure began to desert him: he
took out his handsomely ornamented snuff-box and administered to
himself a mighty pinch. It did him good, and he walked on and was well
nigh arrived at his own door when Manasseh suddenly caught him by a
coat button.
[Illustration: "ADMINISTERED A MIGHTY PINCH."]
"Stand still a second," he cried imperatively.
"What is it?" murmured Grobstock, in alarm.
"You have spilt snuff all down your coat front," Manasseh replied
severely. "Hold the bag a moment while I brush it off."
Joseph obeyed, and Manasseh scrupulously removed every particle with
such patience that Grobstock's was exhausted.
"Thank you," he said at last, as politely as he could. "That will do."
"No, it will not do," replied Manasseh. "I cannot have my coat
spoiled. By the time it comes to me it will be a mass of stains if I
don't look after it."
"Oh, is that why you took so much trouble?" said Grobstock, with an
uneasy laugh.
"Why else? Do you take me for a beadle, a brusher of gaiters?"
enquired Manasseh haughtily. "There now! that is the cleanest I can
get it. You would escape these droppings if you held your snuff-box
so--" Manasseh gently took the snuff-box and began to explain, walking
on a few paces.
"Ah, we are at home!" he cried, breaking off the object-lesson
suddenly. He pushed open the gate, ran up the steps of the mansion and
knocked thunderously, then snuffed himself magnificently from the
bejewelled snuff-box.
Behind came Joseph Grobstock, slouching limply, and carrying Manasseh
da Costa's fish.
CHAPTER II.
SHOWING HOW THE KING REIGNED.
When he realised that he had been turned into a fish-porter, the
financier hastened up the steps so as to be at the _Schnorrer's_ side
when the door opened.
The livery-servant was visibly taken aback by the spectacle of their
juxtaposition.
"This salmon to the cook!" cried Grobstock desperately, handing him
the bag.
[Illustration: "'THIS SALMON TO THE COOK!'"]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account