The Life of Lazarillo of Tormes: His Fortunes and Misfortunes as Told by HimselfAnonymous
General
The Life of Lazarillo of Tormes: His Fortunes and Misfortunes as Told by Himself
Anonymous
Picaresque literature, Spanish; Spain -- Social conditions -- 16th century -- Fiction; Spanish fiction -- Translations into English
"Oh, sir," he said. "I would like to carry out that penance, but
the water is starting to come into my mouth, and I can't."
"If that's the way it is," I said, "the penance I give you is to
drink all the water in the sea."
But he didn't carry that out either because there were many men
there who drank as much as he did. When it came up to my mouth I
said to it: Try some other door, this one is not opening. And
even if it had opened, the water couldn't have gotten in, because
my body was so full of wine it looked like a stuffed pig. As the
ship broke apart a huge swarm of fish came in. It was as though
they were being given aid from the bodies on board. They ate the
flesh of those miserable people who had been overcome by a drop
in the ocean, as if they were grazing in the county pasture.
They wanted to try me out, but I drew my trustworthy sword and
without stopping to chat with such a low-class mob, I laid into
them like a donkey in a new field of rye.
They hissed at me: "We're not trying to hurt you. We only want
to see if you taste good."
I worked so hard that in less than half-a-quarter of an hour I
killed more than five hundred tuna, and they were the ones that
wanted to make a feast out of the flesh of this sinner. The live
fish began to feed on the dead ones, and they left Lazaro's
company when they saw it wasn't a very profitable place to be. I
found myself lord of the sea, with no one to oppose me. I ran
around from one place to another, and I saw things that were
unbelievable: huge piles of skeletons and bodies. And I found a
large number of trunks full of jewels and gold, great heaps of
weapons, silks, linens, and spices. I was longing for it all and
sighing because it wasn't back at home, safe, so that, as the
buffoon says, I could eat my bread dipped in sardines.
I did what I could, but that was nothing. I opened a huge chest
and filled it full of coins and precious jewels. I took some
ropes from the piles of them there and tied up the chest, and
then I knotted other ropes together until I had one I thought was
long enough to reach to the surface of the water. If I can get
all this treasure out of here, I thought to myself, there won't
be a tavernkeeper in the world better off than I'll be. I'll
build up my estate, live off my investments, and buy a summer
house in Toledo. They'll call my wife "Madam," and me they'll
call "Sir." I'll marry my daughter to the richest pastrycook in
town. Everyone will come to congratulate me, and I'll tell them
that I worked hard for it, and that I didn't take it out of the
bowels of the earth but from the heart of the sea. That I didn't
get damp with sweat but drenched as a dried herring. I have
never been as happy in my life as I was then, and I wasn't even
thinking about the fact that if I opened my mouth I would stay
down there with my treasure, buried till hell froze over.
III. How Lazaro Escaped from the Sea
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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