The Lighter Side of English LifeMoore, Frank Frankfort
General
The Lighter Side of English Life
Moore, Frank Frankfort
England -- Social life and customs; England -- Social life and customs -- Humor
John had heard of the Language of Flowers, but he had never mastered the
elements of their speech. As a matter of fact, he took no interest in
flowers or their habits. He had “dratted” them times without number for
their failure to do all that the illustrated catalogues declared they
would do, and now he found reason to drat those of Miss Mercer for
having done much more than he had meant them to do. It was with a view
to restore the balance of mediocrity between the gardens, which had been
through no fault of his, disturbed by a sudden outbreak of “Blushing
Brides” in Miss Mercer's parterre, that he gave some extra waterings
to Mrs. Lingard's verbinas, trusting to convince her that he was
a thoroughly disinterested operator in both the gardens--which was
certainly a fact. But in that arid summer the response of the verbinas
was but too rapid, and Miss Mercer, calling upon her friend (and rival),
was shown the bed with the same pride that she had displayed when
exhibiting her petunias.
She said nothing--the day was Saturday--but she perceived, with that
unerring intuition which in some persons almost takes the place of
genius, that petunias had been supplanted (literally) by verbinas in the
affections of John Bingham.
She spent the Sunday rehearsing an interview which she had arranged in
her mind to have with John Bingham when he should arrive the next day.
But Monday came, and John Bingham failed to arrive. She waited at the
back entrance to the garden until ten o'clock, but still he did not
appear. Then she sent a messenger to his cottage to inquire the cause
of his absence. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday were her days for his
services, and never once had he failed her. She could not guess what was
the matter. She had always regarded him as a sober man and one for whom
Monday morning had no terrors. The mystery of his first failure was
rendered all the more unfathomable when the tweeny maid returned saying
that Mrs. Bingham had told her positive that John had gone out to work
as usual that same morning, and that Mrs. Bingham had taken it for
granted that he was in Miss Mercer's garden.
For a quarter of an hour Miss Mercer pondered over the whole incident,
and then she suddenly put on another hat, discarding the garden specimen
with which she had begun the day, and went down the road and round by
the Moated Manor House to where Mrs. Lingard's villa was situated, just
beyond the knoll of elms. The hall door was wide open to the morning
air, and through the glass door at the farther end of the hall she
distinctly saw Mrs. Lingard standing on the edge of one of the beds of
the garden with John Bingham kneeling at her feet.
And this on a Monday morning!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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