Her hands were mutinous of the restraint he put upon them, and
unconsciously she was beginning to pull and tug to be away from him.
Also, there was fear in her eyes. He knew her fastidiousness, and he
guessed, with the other man's lips recent on hers, that she feared a
more ardent expression on his part.
"And please, please be not frightened, timid, sweet, beautiful, proud,
little bird-woman. See. I release you. Know that I love you most
dearly, and that I am considering you as well as myself, and before
myself, all the while."
He drew his chair away from her, leaned back, and saw confidence grow
in her eyes.
"I shall tell you all my heart," he continued, "and I shall want you to
tell me all your heart."
"This love for me is something new?" she asked. "A recrudescence?"
"Yes, a recrudescence, and no."
"I thought that for a long time I had been a habit to you," she said.
"But I was loving you all the time."
"Not madly."
"No," he acknowledged. "But with certainty. I was so sure of you, of
myself. It was, to me, all a permanent and forever established thing. I
plead guilty. But when that permanency was shaken, all my love for you
fired up. It was there all the time, a steady, long-married flame."
"But about me?" she demanded.
"That is what we are coming to. I know your worry right now, and of a
minute ago. You are so intrinsically honest, so intrinsically true,
that the thought of sharing two men is abhorrent to you. I have not
misread you. It is a long time since you have permitted me any
love-touch." He shrugged his shoulders "And an equally long time since
I offered you a love-touch."
"Then you _have_ known from the first?" she asked quickly.
He nodded.
"Possibly," he added, with an air of judicious weighing, "I sensed it
coming before even you knew it. But we will not go into that or other
things."
"You have seen..." she attempted to ask, stung almost to shame at
thought of her husband having witnessed any caress of hers and Graham's.
"We will not demean ourselves with details, Paula. Besides, there was
and is nothing wrong about any of it. Also, it was not necessary for me
to see anything. I have my memories of when I, too, kissed stolen
kisses in the pause of the seconds between the frank, outspoken 'Good
nights.' When all the signs of ripeness are visible--the love-shades
and love-notes that cannot be hidden, the unconscious caress of the
eyes in a fleeting glance, the involuntary softening of voices, the
cuckoo-sob in the throat--why, the night-parting kiss does not need to
be seen. It has to be. Still further, oh my woman, know that I justify
you in everything."
"It... it was not ever... much," she faltered.
"I should have been surprised if it had been. It couldn't have been
you. As it is, I have been surprised. After our dozen years it was
unexpected--"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account