He had flung out his arm with a characteristic gesture, but at her last
words it suddenly stiffened and remained, as if it had been frozen in
the air. Slowly it dropped at his side as he stared at her with ashen
face--a look of shocked and disconcerted inquiry. For the exclamation,
as at the swift slash of a blade, had torn away a veil, woven of time
and habit, that covered an old wound. For twenty years by tacit
consent this hidden thing of the past had never been acknowledged by
any word or deed between them. Now a single sentence had laid it bare,
quick and quivering and mutually confessed. They had been married
twenty-two years, and if in that early period he had discerned any lack
in her, he had given her no reproaches. On her part, she had fulfilled
what she esteemed her whole duty, and in her own mind stood blameless.
And he had had his profession. But in the end starved nature had
reasserted itself. There had come to him a passion, swift and terrible
while it lasted, to which he had surrendered wholly--till death swept
it from him. The gall and wormwood had been sweetened then by the
birth, in merciful coincidence with that loss, of his twin children.
He had thought the episode buried forever from sight and hearing, but a
later chance had discovered it to his wife, and in her own
immaculateness she had been able neither to forget nor to forgive. It
had made no difference in her life before their world. Cold and
perfect and correct, she had held her way, but from the day when she
had faced him with his secret in her hand, their hearts had been
strangers to one another. He had climbed high and she had risen with
him. And in twenty years no word had fallen from her lips to open that
old tomb--till to-night when the heavy doors swung ajar at the echo of
that one exclamation.
"As _I_ looked to--_you_!" There it was--the old ghost, called up to
haunt his present as it had waylaid his past. His hand fumbled for the
discarded eye-shade and adjusted it as he slowly said:
"I have never counted myself a pattern, Charlotte--least of all for my
own son."
She caught the note of pain and weariness now in his voice, and
something new and unaccustomed stirred for one brief moment in her
heart. She had struck harder than she had intended. But she had lost
control at a critical moment and old bitterness, that had never been
tinctured with the sweetness of charity and forgiveness, had sharpened
her tongue. Now his shocked white face smote her with a sense of
self-reproach whose very strangeness threw her momentarily off her
poise. For a fleeting second words trembled on her tongue that might
have dissolved the icy barrier between them. But the golden second
passed.
"That is generous," she said with a distant laugh.
"No doubt Chilly will profit by experience, if not by precept. Shall
you be at court to-morrow?"
"Yes," he answered. "I have a hearing."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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