The beginner usually thus learns the first principles of conjugation. First Person, I love. This is a joy and a revelation and he is the happiest man on earth. Second Person, Thou lovest. This completes his rapture and he is in Heaven. Third Person, He loves. This is known as the Tertium Quid and casts the beginner into the depths of Hades. SOME ARCADIAN BROMIDIOMS “When did you first begin to love me?” “Do you love me as much as ever?” “You don’t love me any more.” “I never loved any girl but you.” “Oh, I thought I loved him, but now I know it wasn’t really love.” “They think they’re happy, but they don’t know what love means,—as we do.” “Do you really think I’m pretty?” “I don’t see why you love me.” “Nobody in all the world ever loved as we do.” “How did you come to love me in the first place?” “Would you forgive me anything?” EXERCISE FOR THE LANGUAGE STUDENT A VERY PRETTY QUARREL HE—Tell me you love me, pretty poppet SHE—I love you more than you love me! HE—Oh, no! Excuse me, my own moppet; But truly, sweet, that cannot be! SHE—What cannot be? HE— That you _could_ love me More or as much as I love you. SHE—Ah, so you set yourself above me? HE—No, no! not that! SHE— Oh, yes, you do! HE—Now do be reasonable, dearie. SHE— I will be, sir, if you’ll allow I love you best. HE— You make me weary! SHE—Well, just admit it, anyhow. HE—I won’t! SHE— If you _did_ love me best, dear, You’d say whatever I might ask, _Because_ I ask it. HE— Chuck the rest, dear; You’ve set me now an easy task. SHE—I love you best! Is not that so, love? HE— It is; and thus we meet the test I say what you command, you know, love, Only because _I_ love _you_ best! SHE—You horrid thing! HE— Why, what now, Janet? I said just what you asked me to! SHE—You’re mean and cruel! HE— You began it! SHE— I didn’t! You did! HE— No; ’twas you! HE—Come, dearie, stop this silly snarling; You _do_ love most, I spoke in jest; SHE—No, no, _your_ love is greatest, darling; HE— No, my sweetheart, _you_ love _me_ best! (_Repeat ad lib. D. C. al fine_) DEGREES OF LOVE Positive: My Own! Comparative: My Owner! Superlative: My Ownest! DEFINITIONS