England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Ted stalked straight into the summer house, with his head in the air
and his mind filled with high-souled resolutions. Any one less
occupied with his own reflections would have seen that Katharine was
sitting with an absent look in her eyes, while the book she held in
her hand was open at the index-page. But Ted only saw in her the woman
he had just sworn within him to respect; and he took the book
reverently out of her hand, and sat down, also just behind her, on the
end of the basket chair. It was the same basket chair.
"Kitty, I say," he began, clearing his throat, "I've come to tell you
something."
Katharine glanced at his solemn face, and looked away again. She
wished he had not sat just there.
"It must have something to do with a funeral, then," she said, with a
flippancy that would have aroused the suspicions of a more observant
person. But Ted was still absorbed in his high-souled resolutions, and
her abstraction failed to make any impression on him.
"No, it hasn't," he rejoined gloomily. "I wish it had! I shouldn't
mind being dead, not I! It would cure this hump, anyhow. Perhaps some
one would be sorry, then; don't know who would, though! _She_'d only
complain of the expense of burying me."
"Poor old man, who has been bullying you now?" asked Katharine, in a
dreamy voice that she strove to make interested. "Has _she_ been doing
anything fresh?"
"Has she, that's all! She's been doing something to some purpose, this
time. Got me a beastly job, in a beastly city place; a pound a week;
soap, or wholesale clothing, or something poor. Says I ought to be
thankful to get anything. Thankful indeed! _She_ never shows a spark
of gratitude for her bally seven hundred a year, I know."
"Oh, Ted! every one is going away. What shall I do?" The words escaped
her involuntarily. But he was still too full of his own troubles to
notice anything except that she seemed distressed; and this, of
course, was only natural.
"I knew you'd be cut up," he said, kicking savagely at the leg of the
chair. "You're the only chap who cares; and you'll forget when I've
been gone a week. Oh, yes, you will! I ought never to have been born.
They're sure to be rank outsiders, too; and I can stand anything
sooner than bounders. It's too beastly caddish for words, and I'd like
to kill him for his rotten advice. What does he know about anything, a
played-out chap like that?"
Ted's conversation was apt to become involved when he was agitated;
but on this occasion Katharine made no attempt to unravel it.
"Poor Ted," she murmured tonelessly, and continued to think about
something else.
"I don't know why you are so cut up about it. I'm such a rotten ass,
and you're so infernally smart! I haven't any right to expect you to
care a hang about me; I won't even ask you to write to me, when I'm
gone," cried Ted, making desperate efforts to keep his high-souled
resolutions. "It's a rotten, caddish world, and I'm the rottenest fool
in it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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