Humorous stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
“If those beautiful words were deserved, Mary--and God knows I believed I
deserved them once--I think I could give the forty thousand dollars for
them. And I would put that paper away, as representing more than gold
and jewels, and keep it always. But now--We could not live in the shadow
of its accusing presence, Mary.”
He put it in the fire.
A messenger arrived and delivered an envelope. Richards took from it a
note and read it; it was from Burgess:
“You saved me, in a difficult time. I saved you last night. It was
at cost of a lie, but I made the sacrifice freely, and out of a
grateful heart. None in this village knows so well as I know how
brave and good and noble you are. At bottom you cannot respect me,
knowing as you do of that matter of which I am accused, and by the
general voice condemned; but I beg that you will at least believe that
I am a grateful man; it will help me to bear my burden. [Signed]
‘BURGESS.’”
“Saved, once more. And on such terms!” He put the note in the fire.
“I--I wish I were dead, Mary, I wish I were out of it all!”
“Oh, these are bitter, bitter days, Edward. The stabs, through their
very generosity, are so deep--and they come so fast!”
Three days before the election each of two thousand voters suddenly
found himself in possession of a prized memento--one of the renowned
bogus double-eagles. Around one of its faces was stamped these words:
“THE REMARK I MADE TO THE POOR STRANGER WAS--” Around the other face
was stamped these: “GO, AND REFORM. [SIGNED] PINKERTON.” Thus the
entire remaining refuse of the renowned joke was emptied upon a single
head, and with calamitous effect. It revived the recent vast laugh and
concentrated it upon Pinkerton; and Harkness’s election was a walk-over.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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