The Man Upstairs and Other StoriesWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Man Upstairs and Other Stories
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories, English
'Good-bye, Sir Knight,' he said. 'Good-bye. Pay at ye desk.'
And Agravaine rode on his way marvelling.
THE GOAL-KEEPER AND THE PLUTOCRAT
The main difficulty in writing a story is to convey to the reader
clearly yet tersely the natures and dispositions of one's leading
characters. Brevity, brevity--that is the cry. Perhaps, after all, the
play-bill style is the best. In this drama of love, football
(Association code), and politics, then, the principals are as follows,
in their order of entry:
ISABEL RACKSTRAW (an angel).
THE HON. CLARENCE TRESILLIAN (a Greek god).
LADY RUNNYMEDE (a proud old aristocrat).
MR RACKSTRAW (a multi-millionaire City man and Radical politician).
More about Clarence later. For the moment let him go as a Greek god.
There were other sides, too, to Mr Rackstraw's character, but for the
moment let him go as a multi-millionaire City man and Radical
politician. Not that it is satisfactory; it is too mild. The Radical
politics of other Radical politicians were as skim-milk to the Radical
politics of Radical Politician Rackstraw. Where Mr Lloyd George
referred to the House of Lords as blithering backwoodsmen and asinine
anachronisms, Mr Rackstraw scorned to be so guarded in his speech. He
did not mince his words. His attitude towards a member of the peerage
was that of the terrier to the perambulating cat.
It was at a charity bazaar that Isabel and Clarence first met. Isabel
was presiding over the Billiken, Teddy-bear, and Fancy Goods stall.
There she stood, that slim, radiant girl, bouncing Ardent Youth out of
its father's hard--earned with a smile that alone was nearly worth the
money, when she observed, approaching, the handsomest man she had ever
seen. It was--this is not one of those mystery stories--it was
Clarence Tresillian. Over the heads of the bevy of gilded youths who
clustered round the stall their eyes met. A thrill ran through Isabel.
She dropped her eyes. The next moment Clarence had made his spring; the
gilded youths had shredded away like a mist, and he was leaning towards
her, opening negotiations for the purchase of a yellow Teddy-bear at
sixteen times its face value.
He returned at intervals during the afternoon. Over the second Teddy-bear
they became friendly, over the third intimate. He proposed as she was
wrapping up the fourth golliwog, and she gave him her heart and the
parcel simultaneously. At six o'clock, carrying four Teddy-bears, seven
photograph frames, five golliwogs, and a billiken, Clarence went home
to tell the news to his parents.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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