Spruce
I've heard the story of your life several times. What has that story
got to do with our present troubles?
Captain
You will be astonished. This trunk belongs to my brother!
Spruce
How about that?
Captain
And I learn from this letter that our uncle is dead--
Spruce
Amazing--
Captain
--and has left all his money to this twin of mine.
Spruce
That is surprising news--no doubt about it. What good does that do?
Captain
Listen attentively. This is worth a good deal of reflection.
Spruce
I'm listening.
Captain (reading the letter)
"I await you, sir, to pay you the sixty thousand pounds which your
uncle has left you by his will, and to marry you to Miss Flavella
Hastings, of whom I have spoken to you several times in my letters.
The lady likes you very much, and her father is very determined on
this marriage. Don't waste time in getting to London. Your very humble
servant, Charles Torrington."
Spruce
Now, I begin to see--
Captain
Torrington is the name of the honest solicitor who worked for my
father. The date, the envelope, and the name, all confirm my
conclusion. My brother is coming to London in response to this letter,
and, just like me, put his trunk on the coach. And, of course, the
name and address caused your error. I conclude, therefor, not very
cleverly, that my brother is, perhaps, already in London.
Spruce
That's probably right. I am stupefied by the surprising effects of
chance. Necessity caused me to make a mistake, and our fortune will
spring from my stupidity. In a single day, we find a decrepit old
uncle buried--who leaves behind him a fortune, which in life, he
prevented you from attaining. We also find a brother who will receive
the fortune, and relieve you of your lady love. Coincidences like
these are capable of overwhelming the cleverest person!
Captain
We've got to put our heads together about this. I have a good feeling
about it.
Spruce
We could really use that sixty thousand pounds.
Captain
To have them, we will have to use all our skill. They belong to me as
much as to my brother. We must prevent my brother from meeting old
Torrington. Go--run--find out--don't lose a minute.
Spruce
You know my zeal and eagerness. If he's in London, I have faithful
friends who will know of it in less than an hour.
Captain
I am going to Urania. Unfortunately, she knows I am back. I must still
pretend to burn with love for her. She has no idea I'm aflame for
Flavella. You know what Urania is like--the old girl loves to break
men's hearts. The airs that old woman puts on are really insufferable.
In fact, she's crazy and loves to be flattered.
Spruce
You're just the man for that, if I may say so, sir.
Captain
What a ray of hope breaks through for my love. While I'm still
uncertain what to do about my brother, I'd best manage her. Go back to
the customs house, to the stage coach.
Spruce
If I'm not mistaken, here comes Urania and Jenny now.
Captain
Go, quickly, where I send you.
(Exit Spruce)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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