The Memoirs of a Failure: with an Account of the Man and His Manuscript — John Shaqi
The Memoirs of a Failure: with an Account of the Man and His ManuscriptKittredge, Daniel Wright
Science
The Memoirs of a Failure: with an Account of the Man and His Manuscript
Kittredge, Daniel Wright
Failure (Psychology) -- Fiction; Harvard University -- Fiction; University of Virginia -- Fiction
“Here,” he whispered, “is a family of cowards, two parents and three
children, a sister and two brothers. One of the brothers is a poet of
some ability, but his family opposes him on the ground that it is not
nice and proper to write such sentiments as he desires to give forth.
Instead of lending a word of encouragement to his feeble will, as
relatives are supposed to do, they show him their utmost contempt. And
he does not realize that contempt from certain persons is a compliment.
They are Pharisees of the purest type; and no more profound coward
exists than a Pharisee, for he or she is invariably a conscious coward,
shamming sincerity.”
The Excelsior descended to the open air, and I gladly followed him; for
the atmosphere was close and exotic within.
“Now I excuse you;” he said to me, yawning, “please do not visit me
again for at least some months.”
IX
I am on the Pacific seaboard, seated in an ocean breeze; the sun,
falling delicately through a mist, makes me feel like a young god
awaiting the daughters of men. It seems as though all nature would
utter passionate yearnings upon this warm, buxom day. Yonder in clear
view are the round, beautifully curved hills, rising gently from the
soft smooth water, like breasts from a woman’s form. And the firm,
supple ship masts leap upward upon the waves.
“The time of the singing of birds is come,
And the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.”
Where is my mate? I am ready for her, and she for me. And yet we are
denied each other. By what right? By whose authority? There is evil
thought in forbidding the pure, the naturally pure, to embrace.
In front of me, built up from the shifting beach, is a huge, stolid
sea-wall, composed of a multitude of boulders, stuck together with
crude, coarse cement. I have examined these boulders somewhat carefully
with my eyes. They have each and every one of them been rolled and
washed and moulded by the sea. And yet no two are alike. Some are
beautifully shaped with radiant crystals in their make-up. Some are
jagged, rough-edged pyramids, uncut, with moss upon them. Many are flat
rocks, worn by the beatings of countless aeons of waves until they are
quite colorless. And then there is another kind which resembles these
last and yet seem different. I refer to the plain, ordinary, flat,
stupid stone, looking for all the world as if it had been created
merely to be trodden upon. But the boulders that interest and amuse
me most are those which are sheer bulks of matter or rather hulks
of space, having their own way, always getting the place they want,
boulders which are proud and satisfied with being exactly the sort
of boulders that they are. I think that they like being big boulders
chiefly because they catch the eye.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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