The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four ActsPinero, Arthur Wing
General
The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four Acts
Pinero, Arthur Wing
Comedy plays; English drama
[_Rising and touching his arm._] Oh, Vincent!
[_She looks round, to assure herself that she is unobserved. MRS.
UPJOHN and ROPER are seated at the tea-table with their heads
together, talking; JIMMIE is at the piano, fingering out a piece of
music; JEYES is half hidden in the arm-chair facing the settee at the
back. LILY tiptoes to the writing-table and seats herself there as
GLADYS reappears showing in the BARON VON RETTENMAYER._
VON RETTENMAYER.
[_A tall, fair young man of three-and-thirty, speaking in thick,
guttural tones-- advancing to LILY._] Aha, goddess! [_Gladys
withdraws._] Many habby returns of the day!
LILY.
H'sh! I'm busy for a moment, Baron.
VON RETTENMAYER.
[_To LILY-- shaking hands with BLAND._] A thousand bardons.
LILY.
Talk to mother and Jimmie.
VON RETTENMAYER.
With bleasure. [_Going to MRS. UPJOHN and ROPER and shaking hands with
them._] How are you, my dear Ma? How are you, Jimmie? [_Waving a hand
to ROPER and JEYES._] My dear Rober! My dear Neegolas!
JIMMIE.
[_To VON RETTENMAYER, mimicking him._] Rober! Neegolas! Why don't they
provide you with throat lozenges at the Embassy, Baron?
[_VON RETTENMAYER laughs. LILY has quickly opened a drawer in the
writing-table and produced a cheque-book. After another glance over
her shoulder, she sweeps the presents aside and writes. Then she
replaces the cheque-book, rises, and returns to BLAND. Again there is
a loud guffaw from VON RETTENMAYER in response to some sally of
JIMMIE'S._
LILY.
[_To BLAND, folding a cheque and slipping it into his hand._]
Promise-- promise you won't make another bet.
BLAND.
[_Unfolding the cheque._] Your cheque?
LILY.
[_Hastily._] Put it in your pocket.
BLAND.
A blank one.
LILY.
[_In a whisper._] Don't fill it in for more than you can help. _I'm_
not over flush.
[_He deliberately tears the cheque into four pieces and, looking at
her steadily, puts them into his waistcoat-pocket._
BLAND.
[_As he does so._] I'll keep those, Lil, for as long as I keep
anything.
LILY.
[_Hotly._] You fool, Vincent!
BLAND.
My dear, as if----!
LILY.
Such ridiculous pride! [_Stamping her foot._] Lord, what I owe to you!
[_GLADYS enters with SAM DE CASTRO. GLADYS is carrying a lace-edged
table-cloth which, assisted by MRS. UPJOHN, she proceeds to lay upon
the tea-table._
BLAND.
[_Moving away to join the others-- to DE CASTRO._] Ha, Sam!
DE CASTRO.
[_A stout, coarse, but genial-looking gentleman of forty, of marked
Jewish appearance, speaking with a lisp-- shaking hands with LILY._]
How are you to-day, Lil? Many happy returnth, wunth more.
LILY.
Thanks, dear old boy. [_Sitting on the settee in front of the
writing-table._] Did I send you a wire this morning?
DE CASTRO.
Not you; not a thix-pen'north.
LILY.
I ought to have done so, to acknowledge your-- what was it?
DE CASTRO.
A ring-- diamondth and thapphires.
LILY.
Ah, yes; beautiful.
DE CASTRO.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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