The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four Acts — John Shaqi
The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four ActsPinero, Arthur Wing
General
The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four Acts
Pinero, Arthur Wing
Comedy plays; English drama
[_Rising and coming to the middle of the room, LILY repeats the
refrain, dancing to it gracefully. JIMMIE also rises and she, ROPER,
VON RETTENMAYER, and DE CASTRO join in the chorus and the dance, the
three men very extravagantly. FARNCOMBE looks on, enraptured, while
MRS. UPJOHN beats time with her hands._
LILY.
[_Singing._]
I'm possessed of all the graces,
Oh, a perfect dr-r-r-ream my face is!
(It may owe to Art a trifle or it mayn't
H'm, it mayn't!)
And I'll cry out for assistance.
Should you fail to keep your distance,
Goodness gracious, mind the paint!
Mind the paint!
Mind the paint! Mind the paint!
A girl is not a sinner just because she's not a saint!
But my heart shall hold you dearer--
You may come a little nearer--
If you'll _only_ mind the paint-- mind the paint!
[_The refrain is repeated as before, MRS. UPJOHN rising and taking a
share in it. Then LILY drops on to the settee before the
writing-table, laughing and holding up her hands in protest._
LILY.
No more, boys! [_ROPER, VON RETTENMAYER, and DE CASTRO gather round
her, applauding her and urging her to continue._] No, no; no more!
I've had such a stiff day----
MRS. UPJOHN.
[_With sudden energy, to everybody._] Out you go, all of you; out you
go!
JIMMIE.
[_To the men._] Come on; let's mizzle. [_Shaking hands with
FARNCOMBE._] Cruel of us to tire her so.
MRS. UPJOHN.
[_Tapping VON RETTENMAYER on the shoulder._] Now, then, Baron!
VON RETTENMAYER.
[_Shaking hands with LILY._] I'm goming.
JIMMIE.
[_Taking VON RETTENMAYER to the door._] Well, _gome_!
MRS. UPJOHN.
[_Pulling ROPER away from LILY._] Now, Uncle!
ROPER.
[_Adjusting his coat._] Mind the paint, Ma.
JIMMIE.
[_Calling out._] Good-bye, Lil!
LILY.
[_As she shakes hands with DE CASTRO, calling to JIMMIE._] Good-bye!
[_JIMMIE and VON RETTENMAYER disappear._
MRS. UPJOHN.
Now, Mr. de Castro! [_Moving with ROPER towards the door._] 'Owever
d'ye think she's goin' to get through her work to-night!
DE CASTRO.
[_Pausing to comb his moustache._] Quite right, Ma---- [_thoughtlessly_]
and a thupper and a danthe afterwardth.
ROPER.
[_Turning upon him quickly._] Sssh! [_In a low voice._] Dam fool!
DE CASTRO.
[_Clapping his hand to his mouth._] Oh----!
[_They glance at JEYES who, hearing de Castro's remark, has left the
window and come forward a step or two._
ROPER.
[_Uneasily._] Er-- good-bye, Nicko.
DE CASTRO.
[_To JEYES, in the same way._] G-good-bye.
JEYES.
[_To both, dryly._] Good-bye.
BLAND.
[_Talking to LILY, neither of them having heard de Castro's slip._]
That jingle-- an echo of old times, eh?
LILY.
[_Looking up at him._] Yes, but not better times than these times,
Vin?
BLAND.
[_Sadly, holding her hand._] Ah, Lil, there are so many tunes in life
left for _you_, my dear!
ROPER.
[_At the door, with MRS. UPJOHN and DE CASTRO-- to BLAND._] Come along,
Vincent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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