SCENE II.--HARPAGON, CLÉANTE, ÉLISE, VALÈRE, MASTER JACQUES, BRINDAVOINE, LA MERLUCHE. HAR. To you, Brindavoine, and to you, La Merluche, belongs the duty of washing the glasses, and of giving to drink, but only when people are thirsty, and not according to the custom of certain impertinent lackeys, who urge them to drink, and put the idea into their heads when they are not thinking about it. Wait until you have been asked several times, and remember always to have plenty of water. JAC. (_aside_). Yes; wine without water gets into one's head. LA MER. Shall we take off our smocks, Sir? HAR. Yes, when you see the guests coming; but be very careful not to spoil your clothes. BRIND. You know, Sir, that one of the fronts of my doublet is covered with a large stain of oil from the lamp. LA MER. And I, Sir, that my breeches are all torn behind, and that, saving your presence ... HAR. (_to_ LA MERLUCHE). Peace! Turn carefully towards the wall, and always face the company. (_To_ BRINDAVOINE, _showing him how he is to hold his hat before his doublet, to hide the stain of oil_) And you, always hold your hat in this fashion when you wait on the guests. SCENE III.--HARPAGON, CLÉANTE, ÉLISE, VALÈRE, MASTER JACQUES. HAR. As for you, my daughter, you will look after all that is cleared off the table, and see that nothing is wasted: this care is very becoming to young girls. Meanwhile get ready to welcome my lady-love, who is coming this afternoon to pay you a visit, and will take you off to the fair with her. Do you understand what I say? ELI. Yes, father. SCENE IV.--HARPAGON, CLÉANTE, VALÈRE, MASTER JACQUES. HAR. And you, my young dandy of a son to whom I have the kindness of forgiving what happened this morning, mind you don't receive her coldly, or show her a sour face. CLE. Receive her coldly! And why should I? HAR. Why? why? We know pretty well the ways of children whose fathers marry again, and the looks they give to those we call stepmothers. But if you wish me to forget your last offence, I advise you, above all things, to receive her kindly, and, in short, to give her the heartiest welcome you can. CLE. To speak the truth, father, I cannot promise you that I am very happy to see her become my stepmother; but as to receiving her properly, and as to giving her a kind welcome, I promise to obey you in that to the very letter. HAR. Be careful you do, at least. CLE. You will see that you have no cause to complain. HAR. You will do wisely. SCENE V.--HARPAGON, VALÈRE, MASTER JACQUES. HAR. Valère, you will have to give me your help in this business. Now, Master Jacques, I kept you for the last. JAC. Is it to your coachman, Sir, or to your cook you want to speak, for I am both the one and the other? HAR. To both. JAC. But to which of the two first? HAR. To the cook. JAC. Then wait a minute, if you please. (JACQUES _takes off his stable-coat and appears dressed as a cook._) HAR. What the deuce is the meaning of this ceremony?