Produced by Mark C. Orton, David E. Brown and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This book was produced from scanned images of public domain material from the Google Print project.) THE MOTLEY MUSE BY THE SAME AUTHOR RUTHLESS RHYMES FOR HEARTLESS HOMES BALLADS OF THE BOER WAR MISREPRESENTATIVE MEN FISCAL BALLADS VERSE AND WORSE MISREPRESENTATIVE WOMEN DEPORTMENTAL DITTIES CANNED CLASSICS * * * * * THE BOLSTER BOOK LORD BELLINGER THE PERFECT GENTLEMAN * * * * * A GROUP OF SCOTTISH WOMEN THE MOTHER OF PARLIAMENTS SPLENDID FAILURES [Illustration] THE MOTLEY MUSE (RHYMES FOR THE TIMES) BY HARRY GRAHAM AUTHOR OF 'RUTHLESS RHYMES FOR HEARTLESS HOMES' ETC. ETC. With Illustrations by LEWIS BAUMER _Second Impression_ NEW YORK LONGMANS, GREEN, AND CO. LONDON: EDWARD ARNOLD 1913 [_All rights reserved_] TO N. B. WHO DESIGNED THE COVER OF THIS BOOK ITS CONTENTS ARE GRATEFULLY DEDICATED NOTE _Many of the verses published in this volume have appeared in the pages of 'The Observer,' 'The Pall Mall Gazette,' and 'The Graphic,' and are here reprinted by kind permission._ CONTENTS PAGE FOREWORD--THE WORLD WE LAUGH IN! xi RHYMES FOR THE TIMES 'WHAT'S IN A NAME?' 1 NOBODY'S DARLING! 3 ROSES ALL THE WAY 6 THE TRIUMPH OF JAM 8 EGREGIOUS EASTBOURNE 10 SARAH OWEN 12 THE LAST HORSED 'BUS 15 STAGE SUPPORT 17 SCRIBBLERS ALL! 20 THE LYONS CUBS 22 'THE CRIES OF LONDON' 25 THE MODEL FARM 27 THE ADVENTURER 29 A PLEA FOR PONTO 31 THE 'WASTER' 33 THE CHOICE 36 ODE ON A DISTANT PROSPECT OF BOSTON SCHOOL 38 THE SPORTING SPIRIT 40 PERSPECTIVE 43 'RAG-TIME' 45 'THE PIPES' 47 MODERN DANCING 49 THE PUBLIC INTEREST 52 THE MILITANTS 54 PLAGUES AT THE PLAY 57 A SUGGESTION 59 THE MODEL MOTORIST 61