Dar ban a man named Villiam Tell Who ban a qvite gude shot. Ay bet yu, ven he tak nice aim, He alvays hit the spot. Ay s'pose he hunting every day And killing lots of game; Ef he ban missing such a chance, Ay tenk it ban a shame. Some fallers yump on him von day, And taking him to yail, And tal him he skol have to pay Sax tousand dollars' bail. "Yeew hiz!" say Tell. "Sax tousand bones! Ay ant got saxty cents!" And so dey mak him breaking stones Behind big iron fence. Den Olaf Gessler say to him: "Bill, yu ban qvite gude shot, So ay skol give yu yust von chance To vinning nice yack pot. Yure son ban purty brave young kid; Ay tell yu, on the dead, Yu skol go free ef you can shoot Dis apple off his head." "Yerusalem!" say Bill, "ef you Skol give me drenk of bock, Ay bet yu ay can shoot dis fruit Off little Yimmie's block; But, ef ay shoot tu low, val, den Yust sidestep qvick, by heck, Or yu skol finding little bunch Of arrows in yure neck!" So Olaf frame it op for Bill, And Bill he tak gude aim, And shoot at little Yimmie's block,-- Ay tal yu, he ban game. And Bill skol knocking apple off, And Yim vent back to school; But Olaf put Bill back in yail, And tal him, "April fool!" THE COURTSHIP OF MILES STANDISH Miles Standish ban having a courtship Ven all of his fighting ban tru; Maester Longfaller tal me about it, And so ay skol tal it to yu. He say to his room-mate, Yohn Alden: "Yu know dis Priscilla, ay s'pose. Last veek, ven ay try to get busy, Priscilla yust turn op her nose." Yohn Alden ban nervy young faller. So Standish yust tal him: "Old pal, Pleese boost me to dis har Priscilla, Yu know ay can't talk wery val. Pleese tal her ay ban a gude soldier, And say ay have money in bank. Ay'd du dis myself, but, ay tal yu, My manners in parlor ban rank." So Yohn go and call on Priscilla, And happen to finding her in; He sit close beside her on sofa, And give her gude lots of his chin. "Miles Standish," he say, "ban gude faller, Hot stuff vith his pistol and knife; And so ay ban coming to tal yu He'd lak yu, Priscilla, for vife." Priscilla, she listen to Alden, And den give him cute little venk, And say: "Vy not speak for yureself, Yohn? Miles Standish ban lobster, ay tenk." So Standish get double crossed planty; And dat's yust vat AY vant, by yee, Ef ever ay get any faller To doing my sparking for me! ROBINSON CRUSOE Maester Robinson Crusoe ban lonely old faller Who ban on an island gude long time ago; His friends all ban lost in a yolly big shipwreck; But Robinson alvays ban lucky, yu know. He get on dis island, and can't get avay, "By yiminy," say Crusoe, "ay tenk ay skol stay!"