The Observations of Henry: IllustratedJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
The Observations of Henry: Illustrated
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories, English; Waiters -- Fiction
“Well, there I left her to work out the thing for herself, having
come to the conclusion she was capable of doing it; and so for
another couple of weeks I merely watched. There was no doubt
about his being in love with her. He had entered that Cafe at the
beginning of the month with as good an opinion of himself as a man
can conveniently carry without tumbling down and falling over it.
Before the month was out he would sit with his head between his
hands, evidently wondering why he had been born. I've seen the
game played before, and I've seen it played since. A waiter has
plenty of opportunities if he only makes use of them; for if it
comes to a matter of figures, I suppose there's more love-making
done in a month under the electric light of the restaurant than
the moon sees in a year--leastways, so far as concerns what we
call the civilised world. I've seen men fooled, from boys without
hair on their faces, to old men without much on their heads. I've
seen it done in a way that was pretty to watch, and I've seen
it done in a manner that has made me feel that given a wig and a
petticoat I could do it better myself. But never have I seen it
neater played than Marie played it on that young man of hers. One
day she would greet him for all the world like a tired child that
at last has found its mother, and the next day respond to him in a
style calculated to give you the idea of a small-sized empress
in misfortune compelled to tolerate the familiarities of an
anarchist. One moment she would throw him a pout that said as
clearly as words: 'What a fool you are not to put your arms round
me and kiss me'; and five minutes later chill him with a laugh
that as good as told him he must be blind not to see that she was
merely playing with him. What happened outside the Cafe--for now
and then she would let him meet her of a morning in the Tuileries
and walk down to the Cafe with her, and once or twice had allowed
him to see her part of the way home--I cannot tell you: I only
know that before strangers it was her instinct to be reserved. I
take it that on such occasions his experiences were interesting;
but whether they left him elated or depressed I doubt if he could
have told you himself.
“But all the time Marie herself was just going from bad to worse.
She had come to the Cafe a light-hearted, sweet-tempered girl;
now, when she wasn't engaged in her play-acting--for that's all
it was, I could see plainly enough--she would go about her work
silent and miserable-looking, or if she spoke at all it would be
to say something bitter. Then one morning after a holiday she had
asked for, and which I had given her without any questions, she
came to business more like her old self than I had seen her since
the afternoon Master Tom Sleight had appeared upon the scene. All
that day she went about smiling to herself; and young Flammard,
presuming a bit too far maybe upon past favours, found himself
sharply snubbed: it was a bit rough on him, the whole thing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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