Triumph was not the word to describe Helen's feelings after M.
Vailliant's departure, as in the reaction of exhaustion, which required
that she dab the moisture out of her eyes, she leaned against the wall.
Relief, joy, gratitude! Through a mist she saw her mother and
Henriette looking at her, their strange, puzzled expression not
defined. She grasped only the fact of them and their nearness. All
rancour had passed out of her heart. Her vitality surging back, she
put her arms impetuously around her mother's neck and kissed her.
"Don't choke me!" gasped Madame Ribot.
"I didn't mean to! But I shall you, Henriette!" and she embraced her
sister, in turn.
"I should say you would!" gasped Henriette.
"I'm afraid that repose is foreign to your nature," said her mother.
"It must be," returned Helen, as she released Henriette. "Oh, I've
been ugly to you sometimes, because I couldn't help drawing and knew I
ought to, but I'll never be again! It's all too good. I want to be
alone with it!"
Emancipation was the real word. She went forth into the open air,
freed from the cage, to test her wings. More strands of hair loosing
as she raced along, she struck the fields and through the village,
calling out to all the people she knew, but not stopping to talk, and
on up to a hilltop, where the plotted glory of the farmlands lay before
her, with the fields of grain waving gold.
A thousand francs! was her mundane thought. She could live on that a
long time in Paris, drawing and studying. It did not matter how plain
she was. She might have a nose as big as a prize potato and yellow
eyes and rat teeth. People were not going to look at her, but at her
pictures. Her face need never hurt her again. She did not know that
she had a face when she was drawing. She was young, with the long span
of years stretching straight before her--straight, straight, like the
great main roads of France! It was all clear--unless war came. But it
could not come. It was too hideous a thought. The world was too
beautiful to be drenched with blood; too wise to be so foolish.
Returning homeward she thought of many things; even of that seventeenth
cousin and how she would like to do a charcoal of him. She would,
while Henriette painted him. With no idea of the time that had
elapsed, dust-covered, a rent in her gown from a thorn-bush, she burst
in on her mother and sister, who were halfway through dinner.
"You are a sight!" said Madame Ribot. "Do change before you sit down!"
Upstairs in her room she looked into her mirror with a new sense of
defiance.
"Oh, you are plain, but do you think that matters?" She held her hands
up in front of her face. "Five fingers like everybody else and they
can hold a crayon or a brush! Silly!" She laughed again and the
mirror laughed back in the glorious secret of--triumph was the word,
this time.
"M. Valliant must really think highly of your charcoals," said
Henriette at table, "or he wouldn't have taken the painting."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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