London (England) -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
Inexperience was her chief weakness. Intuition, impulse and insight she
possessed in high degree, but these alone would not suffice her, would
not enable her to make her new position unassailable. It was certain,
once the first rush of pleasurable emotion was over, that Maddison would
begin to weigh the consequences of what he had done, that he would
question whether stress of circumstances had not driven him to act
foolishly in tying himself so closely to her. He would study her keenly
to find out whether she was really charming or only appeared so to him.
The woman desired is so often more desirable than the woman won. It must
be her unremitting task never to disappoint him in any way, and in this
the chief difficulty would be to know where to draw the line between the
utter submission to his will which might lead to rapid satiation and the
making it difficult for him to gain his every point without feeling that
he was not being given all that he was paying for. She must make her
hold upon him so tight that there would be no chance of his easily
loosening it before she herself might desire to be free. She determined
that no avoidable rashness or haste should endanger the future.
Maddison acted as she expected. After the first outburst of passion he
was strongly impelled to draw back, to survey critically the situation
into which he had been drawn almost against his will, and certainly
against his better judgment, and to ask himself repeatedly if there
could be any continued content for him in this liaison.
He settled Marian in a pretty flat not far from his studio, and the
first test to which he put her was to watch carefully her taste in the
decorating and furnishing of her new home.
“I want everything to be just what you like,” she said to him, as they
surveyed the bare, unpapered rooms. “It is so lovely to start with
everything to do and not to have to put up with what other people have
put up. Everything must be just what you like, George.”
He laughed.
“What _I_ like?—What _you_ like.”
“Perhaps we shall both like the same things! Though it’s cheeky of me to
imagine that my taste could be as good as yours. I don’t think I shall
want anything you will consider dreadful, but you must teach me what are
the best things. Only, do let everything be pretty and quiet—and not
too many things. And don’t let’s go to one shop and get everything
there; I’d much rather do it bit by bit. I want a home—our home—not a
gimcrack shop or a ready-made bandbox as if I were a new hat—a real
_home_.”
She spoke the word almost sadly, and turning away from him, went across
the room and looked out of the window at the canal, the noisy road, the
vast vistas of houses and the dun-colored sky. Her tone touched him, as
she had hoped it would; there rushed in on him a sudden realization that
he had taken into his keeping a human soul, a lonely soul that had
called to him for help.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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