XIII. To say that we should not change our drinks is a heresy; the tongue becomes saturated, and after the third glass yields but an obtuse sensation. XIV. A dessert without cheese is like a beautiful woman who has lost an eye. XV. A cook may be taught, but a man who can roast, is born with the faculty. XVI. The most indispensable quality of a good cook is promptness. It should also be that of the guests. XVII. To wait too long for a dilatory guest, shows disrespect to those who are punctual. XVIII. He who receives friends and pays no attention to the repast prepared for them, is not fit to have friends. XIX. The mistress of the house should always be certain that the coffee be excellent; the master that his liquors be of the first quality. XX. To invite a person to your house is to take charge of his happiness as long as he be beneath your roof. DIALOGUE between the author and his friend. (after the usual salutations.) FRIEND. As my wife and myself were at breakfast this morning, we came to the conclusion that you should print, as soon as possible, your Gastronomical Observations. AUTHOR. What the wife wishes God wills. In six words that is the charta of Paris. I, though, am not subject to that law, for I am an unmarried man. FRIEND. Bachelors, though, are as subject to the law as others are, sometimes much to our injury. Single blessedness here, however, will not save you. My wife says she has a right to order, because you began your book at her country-house. AUTHOR. You know, dear Doctor, how I defer to the ladies; more than once you have found my submission to their orders. You also were one of those who said I would make an excellent husband. I will not, however, print my book. FRIEND. Why not? AUTHOR. Because being devoted, from the nature of my profession, to serious studies, I fear that those who only know the title of my book will think that I devote myself to trifles. FRIEND. A panic terror! Thirty-six years of constant toil and labor for the public, have made you a reputation. Besides, my wife and I think every body would read you. AUTHOR. Indeed! FRIEND. The learned will read your book to ascertain what you have to tell. AUTHOR. Perhaps. FRIEND. Women will read your book because they will see--- AUTHOR. My dear friend, I am old, I am attacked by a fit of wisdom. Miserere mei. FRIEND. Gourmands will read you because you do them justice, and assign them their suitable rank in society. AUTHOR. Well, that is true. It is strange that they have so long been misunderstood; I look on the dear Gourmands with paternal affection. They are so kind and their eyes are so bright. FRIEND. Besides, did you not tell me such a book was needed in every library. AUTHOR. I did. It is the truth--and I would die sooner than deny it. FRIEND: Ah! you are convinced! You will come home with me? AUTHOR. Not so. If there be flowers in the author's path, there are also thorns. The latter I leave to my heirs.