The poems of Mary HowittHowitt, Mary (Mary Botham)
General
The poems of Mary Howitt
Howitt, Mary (Mary Botham)
English poetry -- 19th century
_Schol._ Sir, had the will of God ordained a wider,
A nobler sphere of usefulness on earth,
He would have given me strength, and health, and power
For its accomplishment. I murmur not
That little has been done, but rather bless Him
Who has permitted me to do that little;
And die content in his sufficient mercy,
Which has vouchsafed reward beyond my merit.
_Philos._ Nay, I must serve you! Let me but contribute
Unto your body’s ease. This wretched room,
And its poor pallet--would you not desire
A lighter, airier, more commodious chamber,
Looking out to the hills; and where the shine
Of the great sun might enter--where sweet odours,
And almost spiritual beauty of fair flowers
Might gratify the sense--and you might fall
Gracefully into death, in downy ease?
Speak, and all this is yours!
_Schol._ Here will I die!
Here have I lived--here from my boyhood lived;
These naked walls are like familiar faces,
And that poor pallet has so oft given rest
To my o’erwearied limbs, there will I die!
_Philos._ But you do need physicians--here is gold,
I know the scholar’s fee is scant enough!
I will go hence, and send you an attendant.
_Schol._ I cannot take your gold, I want it not.
My sickness is beyond the aid of man;
And soon, even now, I did expect my mother.
_Philos._ [_affecting sorrow._] My dear young friend, I have to ask
your pardon;
The letter that I promised to deliver,
I did forget--indeed I gave it not!
_Schol._ How have I trusted to a broken reed!
Oh mock me not with offers of your friendship,
Say not that thou would serve me!
Oh my mother--
Poor, broken-hearted one, I shall not see thee!
[_He covers his face for a moment, then,
rises up with sudden energy._
Whoe’er you are, and for what purpose come,
I know not--you have troubled me too long--
But something in my spirit, from the first,
Told me that you were evil; and my thought
Has often inly uttered the rebuke,
“Get thee behind me, Satan!” Leave me now--
Leave me my lonely chamber to myself,
And let me die in peace!
[_The Philosopher goes out, abashed.
The scholar falls back into his chair,
exhausted; after some time recovering,
he faintly raises himself._
’Tis night fall now--and through the uncurtained window
I see the stars; there is no moon to-night.
Here then I light my lamp for the last time;
And ere that feeble flame has spent itself,
A soul will have departed!
Let me now
Close my account with life; and to affection,
And never-cancelled duty, give their rights:
[_He opens his Bible and inscribes it._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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