The Politeness of Princes, and Other School StoriesWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Politeness of Princes, and Other School Stories
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Schools -- Fiction
He spent the earlier part of Wednesday morning in breaches of the
peace. Mr. Langridge, instead of pulling him up, put him on to
translate; Dunstable went on to translate. As he had not prepared the
lesson and was not an adept at construing unseen, his performance was
poor.
After a minute and a half, the form-master wearied.
"Have you looked at this, Dunstable?" he asked.
There was a time-honoured answer to this question.
"Yes, sir," he said.
Public-school ethics do not demand that you should reply truthfully to
the spirit of a question. The letter of it is all that requires
attention. Dunstable had _looked_ at the lesson. He was looking
at it then. Masters should practise exactness of speech. A certain
form at Harrow were in the habit of walking across a copy of a Latin
author before morning-school. They could then say with truth that they
"had been over it." This is not an isolated case.
"Go on," said Mr. Langridge.
Dunstable smiled as he did so.
Mr. Langridge was annoyed.
"What are you laughing at? What do you mean by it? Stand up. You will
write out the lesson in Latin and English, and show it up to me by
four this afternoon. I know what you are thinking. You imagine that
because this is the end of the term you can do as you please, but you
will find yourself mistaken. Mind--by four o'clock."
At four o'clock Dunstable was enjoying an excellent tea in Green
Street, Park Lane, and telling his mother that he had had a most
enjoyable term, marred by no unpleasantness whatever. His holidays
were sweetened by the thought of Mr. Langridge's baffled wrath on
discovering the true inwardness of the recent episode.
* * * * *
When he returned to Locksley at the beginning of the winter term, he
was at once made aware that that episode was not to be considered
closed. On the first evening, Mr. Day, his housemaster, sent for him.
"Well, Dunstable," he said, "where is that imposition?"
Dunstable affected ignorance.
"Please, sir, you set me no imposition."
"No, Dunstable, no." Mr. Day peered at him gravely through his
spectacles. "_I_ set you no imposition; but Mr. Langridge did."
Dunstable imitated that eminent tactician, Br'er Rabbit. He "lay low
and said nuffin."
"Surely," continued Mr. Day, in tones of mild reproach, "you did not
think that you could take Mr. Langridge in?"
Dunstable rather thought he _had_ taken Mr. Langridge in; but he
made no reply.
"Well," said Mr. Day. "I must set you some punishment. I shall give
the butler instructions to hand you a note from me at three o'clock
to-morrow." (The next day was a half-holiday.) "In that note you will
find indicated what I wish you to write out."
Why this comic-opera secret-society business, Dunstable wondered. Then
it dawned upon him. Mr. Day wished to break up his half-holiday
thoroughly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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