The Pot Boiler: A Comedy in Four ActsSinclair, Upton
General
The Pot Boiler: A Comedy in Four Acts
Sinclair, Upton
Comedy plays
_Peggy_. Yes--if you sit up all night and work! Don't you know that
when you work all night your stomach stops working all day? Haven't
you sworn to me on the Bible you'd never work at night again?
_Will (seizes her in his arms)_. Peggy! I've got to do this play!
I've started it.
_Peggy_. What?
_Will_. What do you think I've been doing all afternoon? _(Pulls out
a huge wad of loose papers from rear pocket.)_ Look at that! _(Drags
her to the table._) Now sit down here and listen--I'll tell you
about it. I'm going to tell my own story--a rich young fellow who has
a quarrel with his father and goes out into the world to make his
own way. I'm going to call him Jack, but he's really myself. Imagine
me as I was at twenty-one-when I was happy, care-free, full of fun.
_Peggy._ Oh, Will, I can't imagine you! I can't bring myself to
believe that you were ever rich and free!
_Will._ But I was, Peggy! And this will bring it all back to you.
When you read this manuscript you'll see me when I didn't know what
trouble meant-I'd never had to make an effort in my life, I couldn't
imagine what it would be to fail. Oh, what a wonderful time it was,
Peggy! It's been wonderful just to recall it here. I've pictured my
twenty-first birthday--I had a dinner party in the big
drawing-room of Dad's home! (_As Will goes on the Real-play fades, and
the Play-play comes slowly into sight._) There's Jessie, my sister, and
there's my cousin, Bob. He's a college professor who went out into the
world as a hobo in order to see life for himself. You see it's all my
story--my _own_ story! Only my name's to be Jack, you know! Here's the
manuscript! Read it!
(_Full light on the Play-play. The Real-play figures are in
darkness, visible only in silhouette. Will exchanges places with a
substitute concealed on upstage side of the desk, and then slips
below the level of the desk and exit Left, to make quick change for
entrance into Play-play in the role of Jack._)
_Jessie._ But Bob--
_Bob._ Well, Jessie?
_Jessie._ You're so hard on people, Bob!
_Bob._ Not at all! It's life that's hard, and you don't know it.
Neither does Jack!
_Jessie._ Why do you want him to know it?
_Bob._ I want him to do his share to change it--instead of idling
his life away.
_Jessie._ He's going to college, isn't he?
_Bob (laughs)._ A lot of good that's doing!
_Jessie._ Don't you believe in going to college?
_Bob._ Not the way Jack's doing it. It's all play to him, and I want
him to work. Just as I was trying to tell him a while ago--
_Jessie._ You're always nagging at him, Bob.
_Bob._ I want to teach him something. Something about the reality of
life.
_Jack (enters Play-play left in evening dress)._ Good heavens! You
two still arguing?
_Bob._ Yes, Jack--still arguing!
_Jack._ Can't you cut it out for one evening? I'm not in your class
in college.
_Bob._ If you were, Jack, you'd learn something real about the world
you live in.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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