Humorous stories, English; Men -- Societies and clubs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
His suggestion was warmly supported and accepted by the chairman. Some
members followed the comfortable example of Mr Matthews. Some chuckled
over the clever caricatures, drawn on the back of bridge-markers, with
which Wildersley had been occupying his enforced leisure; an excess of
zeal over discretion had put him out of the game at an early stage.
All consulted the secretary’s score-sheet. Quillian was leading with a
score of nine. The secretary and Sir Charles were each at eight. Major
Byles was three, and Pusely-Smythe one. Jimmy Feldane was minus one,
and Lord Herngill—who had at one time reached the noble score of
four—had by reckless challenging brought himself to the perilous
position of minus two.
‘Can’t make it out,’ said Mr Matthews to him. ‘You used to set all our
problems. You ought to be a flyer at this kind of a game.’
‘It’s an easy job to set problems,’ said Leonard, ‘and to set them so
that you can solve them, but it’s a different thing altogether to
solve the problems that somebody else has set.’
‘Oh, well, it’s an open thing still. Quillian’s just leading, but I
don’t believe he’ll pull it off. Shan’t be surprised if old Bunford is
two hundred and twenty the richer before the evening’s out.’
Proceedings were now resumed. ‘Come, now, Pusely-Smythe,’ said the
chairman, ‘we’ve not heard much from you to-night.’
‘Afraid of being challenged?’ suggested Quillian.
‘As a rule,’ said Pusely-Smythe angrily, ‘I’m told that I am much too
venturous. However, my learned friend, if you want to talk, go on and
I will wait for you. The chairman called on me to speak, not you, and
as a matter of fact, I had a thing to say. But let it go—it may make
trouble later, and then you’ll remember I told you what would come of
this. Your blessed challenges, indeed! You may think you can do
everything, but I know you can do very little.’
Quillian stared at him aghast and perplexed.
‘Really,’ he said, ‘I don’t understand this outburst. I had not the
slightest intention——’
But here he was interrupted by Pusely-Smythe’s laughter. ‘All right,
old man,’ said Pusely-Smythe cheerily. ‘Don’t worry. It was all spoof
and part of the game. Thanks to you, I’ve just made five undetected
quotations from the work of the bard. You’re my benefactor. In fact,
as the Orientals say, you are my father and my mother, and I am the
son of a dog.’
‘Five?’ said the chairman. ‘It hardly seems possible.’
But Pusely-Smythe made out his list and it was found to be quite
correct. The five quotations were as follows:—
‘I am much too venturous,’ _King Henry VIII._, Act 1, Scene ii.
‘And I will wait for you,’ _Julius Cæsar_, Act 1, Scene ii.
‘I had a thing to say—but let it go,’ _King John_, Act 3, Scene iii.
‘I told you what would come of this,’ _The Winter’s Tale_, Act 4,
Scene iii.
‘I know you can do very little,’ _Coriolanus_, Act 2, Scene i.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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