The promotion of the admiral, and other sea comediesRoberts, Morley
General
The promotion of the admiral, and other sea comedies
Roberts, Morley
English fiction -- 20th century; Sea stories, English; Short stories, English
"Of course," said Sir Richard, and a sudden gust of rage blew the
last opium out of him. "Why, damn it, sir, what the devil do you
mean by laying your filthy paws on me? Where's your captain, sir?
By all that's holy, I'll smash you if you so much as look at me
again."
Now it is a remarkable fact that the utterly and entirely unexpected
will sometimes shake the courage of the stoutest heart. It is
possible that a tiger would itself turn tail if a lamb rushed at him
with open mouth. And though Mr. Simpson would have tackled a
prize-fighter, knowing he was a prize-fighter, the fact that one of
the kind of men whom he was accustomed to wipe his boots on now
turned upon him with entirely strange language and a still stranger
air of authority, for a moment daunted him utterly. He stood still
and gasped, while the admiral strode aft and went up the poop ladder.
He was met there by the captain, who had been the terror of the seas
as a mate. A narrow escape of a conviction for murder had partially
reformed him. He had also become religious, and usually went below
when Simpson or the second "greaser" was hammering any one into
oblivion and obedience.
"What is this?" asked Captain Blaker mildly, yet with a savage eye.
"Mr. Simpson, what do you mean by allowing your authority (and mine
delegated to you) to be disregarded?"
"Sir," said Mr. Simpson, and then the admiral turned on him.
"Hold your infernal tongue, sir," he roared. "And, sir, if you are
the master of this vessel, as I suppose, I require you to put about
for San Francisco. I am a British admiral, sir; my name is Sir
Richard Dunn."
"Oh, you're an admiral and you 'require'?" said Blaker. "Wa'al, I do
admire! You look like an admiral: the water-front is full of such.
Take that, sir."
And the resurgent old Adam in Blaker struck the admiral with such
unexpected force that Dunn went heels over head off the poop and
landed on Simpson. The mate improved the opportunity by kicking him
violently in the ribs. When he was tired, he spoke to the admiral
again.
"Now, you lunatic, take this here ball of twine and go and overhaul
the gear on the main. And if you open your mouth to say another word
I'll murder you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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