The Prude's Progress: A Comedy in Three ActsJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
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The Prude's Progress: A Comedy in Three Acts
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
MRS. BEN DIXON.
I tempted you?
MR. BEN DIXON.
You, Bella. I do not blame you. You loved me--at least you said you
did--and you dangled your purse before me. I thought of all the
good that I could do to others with your money. I always do think of
others--it is my weakness. I sacrificed myself for the good of humanity.
MRS. BEN DIXON.
(_Too staggered for words_). Well, I'm----
MRS. WHEEDLES.
You never thought of poor _me_, Henery.
MR. BEN DIXON.
(_With an air of sweet sadness._) Not think of you, Gertrude? Ah, how
often have I not longed to seek you--to come to you with outstretched
arms and say, "Gertrude, let us forgive and forget, let us be happy
again as we were in the dear old days gone by." (_Stifles a sob._)
MRS. BEN DIXON.
Why didn't you do it?
MR. BEN DIXON.
My dear Bella, do not interrupt. There were reasons rendering it
necessary for me to control my longing--you were one of them.
MRS. WHEEDLES.
And did you never think of what had become of me--of how I was getting
on?
MR. BEN DIXON.
Do you think I could have lived a moment in doubt? I made enquiries.
They told me you were well and----
MRS. BEN DIXON.
You said just now they told you she was dead.
MR. BEN DIXON.
(_Irritably._) My good woman, do be quiet. I'm not addressing you. I'm
talking to my wife.
MRS. WHEEDLES.
Do let the man explain.
MRS. BEN DIXON.
Explain! And do you mean to say you're going to be fool enough to listen
to him--you poor ninny-hammer?
MRS. WHEEDLES.
(_Bridling._) Don't you call me names, ma'am. I'm a respectable married
woman, which is more than some people are.
MRS. BEN DIXON
And whose fault if they're not, I should like to know? Why couldn't you
keep him when you'd got him?--not let him loose to prey on poor fools
like me.
MRS. WHEEDLES.
Why did you come with your arts and your tricks and lure him away,
ma'am?
MRS. BEN DIXON.
I! I lure away _that!_ You silly old woman!
MRS. WHEEDLES.
No more a silly old woman than you are, ma'am. He was a loving Christian
husband till you came between us with your painted face.
MRS. BEN DIXON.
(_Close to her._) You say I paint my face, and I'll pull your false
front off.
MR. BEN DIXON.
(_He has hitherto remained standing between them in an attitude
expressive of pious indifference, his finger-tips pressed against each
other._) Ladies! ladies!
MRS. BEN DIXON.
(_Turns fiercely on him._) You be quiet (_he skips out of her way_),
and keep your breath to bamboozle that poor fool with. You take him back
again, my dear, you haven't had enough of him as yet. I shan't interfere
I am only too glad to be rid of him. Only if he makes a fool of you a
second time, don't you come to me for sympathy. I've done with you both,
and I've done with respectability. I've paid enough for being a prude.
For the future give me something wholesome and disreputable. (_She
sweeps out by door at back which she slams behind her._)
MRS. WHEEDLES.
(_Calling after her_.) Hussy!
MR. BEN DIXON.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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