English drama -- Early modern and Elizabethan, 1500-1600; Shakespeare, William, 1564-1616 -- Spurious and doubtful works
PYE.
Woult believe me, Captain? better then any Conjurer, for here
was no harm in this, and yet their horrible expectation
satisfied well. You were much beholding to thunder and lightning
at this time: it gracst you well I can tell you.
CAPTAIN.
I must needs say so, George. Sirrah, if we could ha convoid
hither cleanly a cracker or a fire-wheel t’ad been admirable.
PYE.
Blurt, blurt! there’s nothing remains to put thee to pain now,
Captain.
CAPTAIN.
Pain? I protest, George, my heels are sorer, then a Whitson
Morris-dancer.
PYE.
All’s past now,—only to reveal that the chains ith Garden
where thou knowst it has lain these two days.
CAPTAIN.
But I fear that fox Nicholas has revealed it already.
PYE.
Fear not, Captain, you must put it to’th venture now. Nay,
tis time: call upon e’m, take pity on e’m, for I believe some
of ’em are in a pitiful case by this time.
CAPTAIN.
Sir Godfrey? Nicholas, Kinsman—Sfoot, they’re fast at it
still, George. Sir Godfrey!
SIR GODFREY.
Oh, is that the devil’s voice? how comes he to know my name?
CAPTAIN.
Fear not, Sir Godfrey, all’s quieted.
SIR GODFREY.
What, is he laid?
CAPTAIN.
Laid; and has newly dropt your chain ith Garden.
SIR GODFREY.
Ith Garden! in our Garden?
CAPTAIN.
Your Garden.
SIR GODFREY.
O sweet Conjurer! where abouts there?
CAPTAIN.
Look well about a bank of Rosemary.
SIR GODFREY.
Sister, the Rosemary bank! come, come, there’s my chain, he
says.
WIDOW.
Oh happiness! run, run.
[Supposed to go.]
EDMOND.
Captain Conjurer?
[Edmond at keyhole.]
CAPTAIN.
Who? Master Edmond?
EDMOND.
Aye, Master Edmond: may I come in safely, without danger,
think you?
CAPTAIN.
Fuh, long ago: tis all as twas at first. Fear nothing, pray
come near—how now, man?
EDMOND.
Oh this Room’s mightily hot, ifaith: slid, my shirt sticks to
my Belly already. What a steam the Rogue has left behind him!
foh, this room must be aired, Gentlemen; it smells horribly of
Brimstone—let’s open the windows.
PYE.
Faith, master Edmond, tis but your conceit.
EDMOND.
I would you could make me believe that, ifaith. Why, do you
think I cannot smell his savour from another? yet I take it
kindly from you, because you would not put me in a fear,
ifaith; a my troth, I shall love you for this the longest day
of my life.
CAPTAIN.
Puh, tis nothing, sir: love me when you see more.
EDMOND.
Mass, now I remember, I’ll look whether he has singed the
hangings or no.
PYE.
Captain, to entertain a little sport till they come, make him
believe you’ll charm him invisible: he’s apt to admire any
thing, you see. Let him alone to give force too’te.
CAPTAIN.
Go, retire to yonder end then.
EDMOND.
I protest you are a rare fellow, are you not?
CAPTAIN.
O master Edmond, you know but the least part of me yet: why,
now at this instant I could but florish my wand thrice o’er
your head, and charm you invisible.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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