Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
“Fool!” she answered. “Fool! I’ve known my own father, who could put a
dozen of you in his pipe and push them down with his finger-end. Don’t
I know what a fool you are!”
He knew himself what a fool he was, and was flayed by the knowledge.
Yet he went on trying to steer the ship of their dual life. He asserted
his position as the captain of the ship. And captain and ship bored
her. He wanted to loom important as master of one of the innumerable
domestic craft that make up the great fleet of society. It seemed to
her a ridiculous armada of tubs jostling in futility. She felt no
belief in it. She jeered at him as master of the house, master of their
dual life. And he was black with shame and rage. He knew, with shame,
how her father had been a man without arrogating any authority.
He had gone on the wrong tack, and he felt it hard to give up the
expedition. There was great surging and shame. Then he yielded. He had
given up the master-of-the-house idea.
There was something he wanted, nevertheless, some form of mastery. Ever
and anon, after his collapses into the petty and the shameful, he rose
up again, and, stubborn in spirit, strong in his power to start afresh,
set out once more in his male pride of being to fulfil the hidden
passion of his spirit.
It began well, but it ended always in war between them, till they were
both driven almost to madness. He said, she did not respect him. She
laughed in hollow scorn of this. For her it was enough that she loved
him.
“Respect what?” she asked.
But he always answered the wrong thing. And though she cudgelled her
brains, she could not come at it.
“Why don’t you go on with your wood-carving?” she said. “Why don’t you
finish your Adam and Eve?”
But she did not care for the Adam and Eve, and he never put another
stroke to it. She jeered at the Eve, saying, “She is like a little
marionette. Why is she so small? You’ve made Adam as big as God, and
Eve like a doll.”
“It is impudence to say that Woman was made out of Man’s body,” she
continued, “when every man is born of woman. What impudence men have,
what arrogance!”
In a rage one day, after trying to work on the board, and failing, so
that his belly was a flame of nausea, he chopped up the whole panel and
put it on the fire. She did not know. He went about for some days very
quiet and subdued after it.
“Where is the Adam and Eve board?” she asked him.
“Burnt.”
She looked at him.
“But your carving?”
“I burned it.”
“When?”
She did not believe him.
“On Friday night.”
“When I was at the Marsh?”
“Yes.”
She said no more.
Then, when he had gone to work, she wept for a whole day, and was much
chastened in spirit. So that a new, fragile flame of love came out of
the ashes of this last pain.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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