ABSOLUTE Ah! my soul, what a life will we then live! Love shall be our idol and support! we will worship him with a monastic strictness; abjuring all worldly toys, to centre every thought and action there. Proud of calamity, we will enjoy the wreck of wealth; while the surrounding gloom of adversity shall make the flame of our pure love show doubly bright. By Heavens! I would fling all goods of fortune from me with a prodigal hand, to enjoy the scene where I might clasp my Lydia to my bosom, and say, the world affords no smile to me but here--[Embracing her.] [Aside.] If she holds out now, the devil is in it! LYDIA [Aside.] Now could I fly with him to the antipodes! but my persecution is not yet come to a crisis. [Re-enter Mrs. MALAPROP, listening.] Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] I am impatient to know how the little hussy deports herself. ABSOLUTE So pensive, Lydia!--is then your warmth abated? Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] Warmth abated!--so!--she has been in a passion, I suppose. LYDIA No--nor ever can while I have life. Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] An ill tempered little devil! She'll be in a passion all her life--will she? LYDIA Think not the idle threats of my ridiculous aunt can ever have any weight with me. Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] Very dutiful, upon my word! LYDIA Let her choice be Captain Absolute, but Beverley is mine. Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] I am astonished at her assurance!--to his face--this is to his face! ABSOLUTE Thus then let me enforce my suit. [Kneeling.] Mrs. MALAPROP [Aside.] Ay, poor young man!--down on his knees entreating for pity!--I can contain no longer.--[Coming forward.] Why, thou vixen!--I have overheard you. ABSOLUTE [Aside.] Oh, confound her vigilance! Mrs. MALAPROP Captain Absolute, I know not how to apologize for her shocking rudeness. ABSOLUTE [Aside.] So all's safe, I find.--[Aloud.] I have hopes, madam, that time will bring the young lady---- Mrs. MALAPROP Oh, there's nothing to be hoped for from her! she's as headstrong as an allegory on the banks of Nile. LYDIA Nay, madam, what do you charge me with now? Mrs. MALAPROP Why, thou unblushing rebel--didn't you tell this gentleman to his face that you loved another better?--didn't you say you never would be his? LYDIA No, madam--I did not. Mrs. MALAPROP Good heavens! what assurance!--Lydia, Lydia, you ought to know that lying don't become a young woman!--Didn't you boast that Beverley, that stroller Beverley, possessed your heart?--Tell me that, I say. LYDIA 'Tis true, ma'am, and none but Beverley---- Mrs. MALAPROP Hold!--hold, Assurance!--you shall not be so rude. ABSOLUTE Nay, pray, Mrs. Malaprop, don't stop the young lady's speech: she's very welcome to talk thus--it does not hurt me in the least, I assure you. Mrs. MALAPROP You are too good, captain--too amiably patient--but come with me, miss.--Let us see you again soon, captain--remember what we have fixed. ABSOLUTE I shall, ma'am. Mrs. MALAPROP Come, take a graceful leave of the gentleman.