Oh that awakening from the torpor of the midday sleep! Whence came that
strange lucidity of mind which made this moment so terrifying?...
His ideas began to waken, mournful, confused, incomplete—at first
mere inconsequent shadowy conceptions, full of mystery, like traces
of a previous existence. Then suddenly dawned conceptions of greater
and agonising clearness. Radiant memories of old days, impressions of
childhood, came back to him, rising from the depths of his irrevocable
past, memories of thatched cottages, of the Cevennes on summer evenings,
mingled with stridulation of African crickets; the agony of separations,
of lost happiness, a swift and harrowing survey of his whole past, the
events of life seen from beneath, like things beyond the tomb—the other
side of existence, the obverse of this world.
... In these moments, especially, he seemed to be conscious of the rapid
and inexorable flight of time, which the tonelessness of his spirit did
not usually permit him to grasp. He woke up, hearing against the resonant
_tara_ the faint throbbing of the arteries in his forehead, and he seemed
to be listening to the pulsations of time, the vibrations of a great
mysterious time-piece of eternity. He had the sensation that the moments
were gliding by, passing, passing with the speed of objects falling into
empty space, while the stream of his life bore him ever onwards, and he
was powerless to stem it....
He rose abruptly, now wide awake, with a wild longing to be gone, in an
agony of despair at the thought of the years that still lay between him
and his return.
* * * * *
Fatou-gaye had a vague instinct that this instant of awakening was a
dangerous and critical time when the white man evaded her influence. So
she was on the watch for this moment, and when she saw Jean open his
mournful eyes, and then suddenly start up with a bewildered look, she
would quickly come and kneel beside him to minister to him, or she would
put her supple arms round his neck and say,
“What is the matter, my white man?” in a voice which she rendered as soft
and languishing as the sound of a griot’s guitar.
... But these fancies of Jean did not last long. When he was wide awake
his usual indifference possessed him once more, and he saw things again
in their normal aspect.
II
... The operation of dressing Fatou’s hair was a very important and
complicated one. It took place once a week, and on this occasion the
whole day was given up to it. In the early morning Fatou set out for
Guet n’dar, the negro village, where in a hut with peaked roof, built
of thatch and dry reeds, dwelt the hairdresser of most repute among the
Nubian ladies.
Fatou remained there for several hours, crouched on the sand,
surrendering herself into the hands of this patient, painstaking artist.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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