The Scaring off of Teddy Dawson: A Comedy in One ActBrighouse, Harold
General
The Scaring off of Teddy Dawson: A Comedy in One Act
Brighouse, Harold
Courtship -- Drama; English drama -- 20th century; Families -- Drama; London (England) -- Drama
(_Unbuckling his belt and going out centre. Polly removes her ironing
from table. Suddenly she assumes a listenin attitude, then tiptoes
to the door L. and opens it quietly. Teddy and Liza are standing just
outside it. He has his arm round her waist. He is a good looking young
man, short, dark, clean-shaven in a shoddy suit with muffler round his
neck._)
Teddy. I love yer so I could eat yer.
Polly. Yer'd 'ave a foine belly ache, an all, if 'er flesh were as sour
as 'er temper. (_Teddy stands amazed, then begins to move away._) Yer'd
never run from a woman, would yer? (_Teddy stops._) Come in. I'm sure
yer welcome. (_Teddy and Liza enter, suspicious and reluctant. Polly
hands a chair out._) Sit yer down. Don't be shy. Yer welcome to come
'ere if yer'll do yer courtin' proper an' drop yer dancin' abart outside
with that whistle of yours. 'Ticin' Liza out after she's bin sent to
bed. Yer slipped out o' back door I reckon, Liza?
Liza (_timidly_). Yus, mother.
Polly. I thought so. (_Cordially._) Well, yer'll 'ave no need to carry
on that road now. We're goin' to 'ave this square an' straight. Liza,
I'm sure Mr. Dawson's ready for a bit of supper. There ain't nothing
like peckin' a bit together when you want to get friendly. (_Finishing
the removal of ironing from table._) Now, Liza, get a move on. Where's
that piece of boiled bacon as we found good chewing yesterday? Bustle
round, girl. (_Liza takes a cloth from dresser, spreads on table and
lays plates, etc., for two, putting out the bacon, a tin loaf, and
butter._)
Polly (_drawing up a chair to Teddy's confidentially_). Yer see, Mr.
Dawson, I'm glad yer come in. I 'aven't arf liked yer plan of workin'.
Comin' 'ere an' whistlin' abart the 'ouse as if yer felt feared o' bein'
seen. (_Teddy shifts uncomfortably._) But that's all over now. We're
goin' to 'ave that altered. (_Looking round at table._) Where's yer
'ead, Liza? Do yer think Mr. Dawson can face 'is supper dry? (_Rising._)
There's some beer in the back. I'll go an' fetch it. (_Looking round as
she reaches the door l._) It's gettin' a bit dark in 'ere, Liza. Things
'ull look more cheerful with a light on. It'll give yer somethin' ter
do ter keep yer out of mischief while I'm gorn. (_Exit Polly l. Liza
immediately lights the gas and puts the blind down. Teddy rises._)
Teddy. Well, blime, Liza this beats everything. Wot made yer tell me
they'd be against it if they knew'?
Liza. I don't understand this no more than yer do. They didn't set abort
it this road with my sisters' fellers.
Teddy. Looks like she's took a fancy to me. Nothin' surprisin' in that
neither. Yer've got a sight better kind of a man than yer sisters ever
'ad.
Liza. That's right enough, Teddy, but I don't like looks of this. Father
used to leather Sally's bloke.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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