am the future," Ralph Pendrel mused, "and I dream of making it speak."
Face to face with it then, when he felt that already and quite
distinctly it was speaking--which happened the first time that ever, key
in hand, he was able to enter it unaccompanied--there was an
inconsequence to note, and one from which he drew a fine pleasure. He
was thus moved more shrewdly to reflect that if he was so trusted there
must have been something in him to inspire it. Was he to such a tune the
future? Had not his taste for "research," which was more personally his
passion for the past, worked rather, and despite his comparative youth,
to transmute him? On the day he disembarked in England he felt himself
as never before ranged in that interest, counted on that side of the
line. It was to this he had been brought by his desire to remount the
stream of time, really to bathe in its upper and more natural waters, to
risk even, as he might say, drinking of them. No man, he well believed,
could ever so much have wanted to look behind and still behind--to scale
the high wall into which the successive years, each a squared block,
pile themselves in our rear and look over as nearly as possible with the
eye of sense into, unless it should rather be called out of, the vast
prison yard. He was by the turn of his spirit oddly indifferent to the
actual and the possible; his interest was all in the spent and the
displaced, in what had been determined and composed roundabout him, what
had been presented as a subject and a picture, by ceasing--so far as
things ever cease--to bustle or even to be. It was when life was framed
in death that the picture was really hung up. If his idea in fine was to
recover the lost moment, to feel the stopped pulse, it was to do so as
experience, in order to be again consciously the creature that had been,
to breathe as he had breathed and feel the pressure that he had felt.
The truth most involved for him, so intent, in the insistent ardour of
the artist, was that art was capable of an energy to this end never yet
to all appearance fully required of it. With an address less awkward, a
wooing less shy, an embrace less weak, it would draw the foregone much
closer to its breast. What he wanted himself was the very smell of that
simpler mixture of things that had so long served; he wanted the very
tick of the old stopped clocks. He wanted the hour of the day at which
this and that had happened, and the temperature and the weather and the
sound, and yet more the stillness, from the street, and the exact
look-out, with the corresponding look-in, through the window and the
slant on the walls of the light of afternoons that had been. He wanted
the unimaginable accidents, the little notes of truth for which the
common lens of history, however the scowling muse might bury her nose,
was not sufficiently fine. He wanted evidence of a sort for which there
had never been documents enough, or for which documents mainly, however
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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