"Oh, I have loved you so long and so truly," she faltered. A sob of
shame and anguish choked her as she arose and turned dizzily toward the
bed. She threw herself face downward upon it, her arms across the
sleeping babe, and burst out into weeping.
Startled into sanity by the violence of her grief he cast himself on
his knees beside the bed.
"I was mad, crazy, Justine," he cried. She shuddered as his hands and
arms touched her. "Oh, God!" he groaned. "My wife, my girl, don't
shrink from me like that. I did not mean it, I did not know what I was
saying. Look up, Justine, my Justine!" He seized her hand and covered
it with kisses. At first she struggled to withdraw it; then suddenly
abandoned it to him. Presently she pressed it against his lips, and
then in an instant her face was turned toward him, the cheeks wet, the
eyes swimming.
"Oh, Jud, you did not think it, I know you didn't," she choked out, and
sobbed again as he lifted and clasped her to his breast. In that
moment he forgot his dreadful mission, forgot the baby and the misery
of everything, and she was happier than she had been in months. Once
more the tender and thoughtful Jud, he drew the covers over her
shivering body and tucked them in, while she smiled happily up into his
wan face.
"Don't you want to see the baby, dear?" she asked, timidly, after a
long time. He had seated himself on the side of the bed, his coat
collar turned up about his chilled throat, his red hands clasped under
his arms. "He is three months old, Jud, and you never knew. It is so
strange you did not receive my letter. I could not write, though, for
many weeks, I was so weak. Oh, Jud, you don't know how much I have
suffered."
It was the first complaint she had ever expressed to him in all those
weary, despairing months of loneliness and privation, and he covered
his face with his hands. She drew them gently away, so that he might
look at the baby. It was with a feeling of shame that he first saw his
child. Young as it was, it bore the features of its father; there
could be no doubt. He gazed upon the little face and the clenched
fists, and a deep reverence came to him. Pity for the baby, the mother
and himself overcame him and he dropped his head upon Justine's
shoulder.
"Justine, forgive me, forgive me," he sobbed.
"There is nothing to forgive, dear. Don't cry," she said, softly. "It
will all come right some day and we'll be so proud of the boy. Isn't
he strong? Just feel of his little arms. And isn't he just like you?
I hope he will grow up to be as good and as strong as you, Jud." He
looked dumbly into her eyes, still dewy with tears, and dropped his
own, lest she should sec the deceit in them. But she was not looking
for deceit.
"You are so cold, dear," she went on, "and you look so ill and tired.
Come to bed and let me get up and make some hot coffee for you. Why,
Jud, it is past midnight, and it is bitterly cold outside. How did you
come from Glenville?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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